With the recent events of Sir Robin Williams or a beautiful gal in my hometown of Portland Oregon by the name of Summer ( whom I personally didnt know but what a sweet soul) maybe just maybe this could help even 1 person ! I personally had been living a double life for the past 6 years... it all started with dental work and prescription pills ~ I never meant to become an addict but it happened. Those things are the devil and I LOVED how it made me feel and this abundance of energy and its not like Im getting them the street corner there from my Dr. so its okay and if I run out its not like there hard to find ! But you see eventually they take over and now its not oh Ill take for a quick buzz Im sick if I dont have and if youve ever felt the effects of being opiate sick its painful and ugly... pills will make you lose people I havent spoke to my parents in over a year... I say this in no malice way, neither one of us knew how to deal with the other ~ just because we become parents doesnt mean we know what the hell were doing ! Ive lost who I thought were friends during my recovery because apparently I wasnt a good friend at the time (well duh I wasnt a good mother or wife what makes you think I have time to entertain you) for the 1st time of my 40 yrs in life I took charge for me ♡ through this journey my husband and I have become such a united team my mother in law saved my life she sacrificed time and money went to meetings and learned about my addiction to better knowledge herself... what a selfless act and Im so honored to be her daughter that she accepted with an open heart ! Towards the end I suffered the darkest days of my life my thoughts were dark and of death and if you used to know me I was a unicorns and rainbows kinda girl... but the mind is strong and you can overcome any obstacle that your challenged with if you want it bad enough ! If any of you bad ass individuals out there know this dark place that overshadows this wonderful journey called life and need to talk please call me (503) 964-1763 zero judgment only love and maybe I can help a fellow citizen out... its hard and its painful there will be days where giving up sounds like a way better option but you to can beat this demon and the aftermath is glorious ~ I still have tons to learn and Ill always be growing but this subject I know a little about ! Anyone fighting dark days there is help out there from lil ol people like us ☆ I Jeanette Everidge Slane also want to apologize to all my people that Ive ever hurt or maybe have felt Ive abandoned them over this past year but please know that is so not the case I love you all and miss you so big I was very sick and needed to get better ! I stopped counting around 160th day because it reminded me of days I wanted to forget but Im clean and healthy and happy and ready to get back out there and start living again ~ special special thanks to Kye and Nick God knew I needed both you wonderful men in my life ! In the beginning this was hard to start writing the nakedness the truth is well was embarrassing but its my story the raw ugliness of addiction and if it helps 1 person on those dark days well then its all worth my truth being told ! Again if anybody ever needs to talk call me anytime of the day (maybe night) jk Im here and I understand ~ peace and love to you all xoj
Posted on: Tue, 19 Aug 2014 19:43:32 +0000