Yesterday morning I stopped by the gas station to put a few gallons in the tank. It had been a long couple of days at the shelter, and I was really tired. I suppose that my exhaustion led to me not noticing the older gentlemen who was circling my van. He startled me with his words. As soon as I acknowledged him, he began into a long and well rehearsed speech. The information came out of him at full blast. I was having a hard time following, but what I gathered is that his son had been in an accident, he borrowed his other sons car to head to the scene, left his wallet in the other car, and was out of gas. It should be noted that I am panhandled more than any human being alive. I do not have any data to back up that claim, but its just true. After more than a decade of being with the poor and homeless, you develop a pretty impressive panhandling story BS detector. There was one man whos family was trapped at the BP in need of a new timing belt for almost two months. I figured he would eventually remember my face to stop selling me the same story, but he never did. The truth is, I understand why some people make up stories. Asking for money for formula will illicit a better response than, my wife left me two years ago because I was a horrible husband, Im living under an overpass, and I really need money, not food, to buy aspirin, because my teeth are falling out. After hearing the snake oil story about the accident, I decided to buy the man a couple of gallons of gas. I stumbled back into the the store an asked if they would put a few dollars on pump eight. The clerk looked at me funny and commented that I had already purchased gas as she swiped my card. I pointed in the general direction of the pump and said, Yeah, that guy just needs some help. Within less than a second she was heading toward the door. Thats panhandling! she yelled at me, Dont you ever do that again! Before I could stop her, she ran at the car and he drove off. Immediately, I felt awful for the judgment I had felt in my own heart. And now this clerk had run him off, and he left thinking I complained about him. I was frustrated, angry, embarrassed. She refunded me my money and told me never to give to beggars again. Needless to say, I will be purchasing my gas somewhere else in the future. One of the major complaints I hear is that the government shouldnt be responsible for the poor, individuals should be. But then society demonizes giving, or laws are created that make it illegal to give or receive. If I cant hear a mana stories and respond as I see fit, we have a major problem. This goes deep into the cycle of poverty, the stigmatization of being homeless. It needs to be ok to ask for help, we need to respond to it. Sometimes someone is telling a lie, sometimes two dollars might save their life. It isnt for me to decide, no matter what my jaded radar says. But at the end of the day, it should be my choice to give. If businesses and governments are regulating being kind to our neighbor, we have truly lost a major element of freedom. We have to stop the criminalizing of poverty in all its ugly and prejudicial forms before it is to late. Love one another and be kind to those who you meet, everyone is on a journey, and sometimes they just need a little gas to get there.
Posted on: Tue, 06 Jan 2015 04:39:55 +0000
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