2014 has been a tragic year with a whirlwind of emotions. On the 9th April 2014, I lost my beloved grandmother, Hajjah Zaleha @ Asmah Binte Abu Bakar, after her painful battle with so many illnesses the past years. A painful loss for the family, undoubtedly. Three weeks after she passed on, we received news that my uncle, Abu Bakar Bin Haji Buang (Pak Abu), whos been very attached to my grandmother his entire life was diagnosed with final stage leukemia. What were the odds, he was in the pink of health weeks before. And we thought it couldnt get any worst. Days went by and his condition continued deteriorating. At that point, we knew we had to let him go. Three months on, and I thought things were gonna be okay but we were hit with news that another uncle, Mohamed Yazid bin Abdullah (Om Yazid), was admitted to the hospital due to the diabetes hes suffered for so long. It wasnt long before things got even more complicated and before we knew, he passed away leaving my aunt with her four children who are still schooling. When I was at his burial site, it got me thinking - that must have been exactly the way people saw my mum with my siblings and I when my dad left us 18 years ago. 2nd Sept 2014, two months after the third passing in the family, we were slapped with news that my grand aunt, Hajjah Halimah binte Abdul Rahman (Nek Mah), passed away. Even though she was a more distant relative, she was still close to the family and we treated her just like our own grandmother. And then.. exactly a month ago on this date.. I had an event I had to coordinate at work. Something I looked forward to. Just as I was done helping the teardown of the event, I received a phonecall from my brother. He sounded hasty, asking me for a cousins phone number. I tried asking whats going on but he brushed me off before hanging up. Within seconds came another call from a cousin asking me if Ive heard the news. What news, I thought?! What was my brother hiding from me? What could it be? And... there I was, fell right to my knees the moment I heard it. The news. I couldnt believe my ears. My knees felt heavy, rooted to the ground. Disbelief - is this really happening? I was praying that it all wasnt true, but deep down I knew. All the calls and text messages that came through. It is real. Ive just lost another family member. He wasnt just a cousin, he was like a big brother, a friend - someone who played a huge role during my childhood. I got in the van. I had to drive and be with the rest of my family. But my knees were shaking, hands trembling. I recited prayers, one after another, to calm myself through the journey. 25th october 2014 - one of the days I will never forget for the rest of my life. A painful goodbye. Nevertheless, I am thankful that the funeral and burial went smoothly. We believe that he is in a better place now. Im glad I had the chance to meet him during Arman Aman s wedding. I was so close to not attending that wedding due to work but cant be thankful enough I did because that was the last time I saw him. To be honest, I never really looked forward to attend weddings in the past but after what happened, I learnt to cherish every chance of a gathering or get together because these simply are chances for me to meet old friends as well as distant and close relatives. Something I should learn to appreciate, for we will never know that day could be the last we ever see them. This loss, was truly unexpected. It was all too sudden, so much that it greatly impacted our family. All of us cousins were closer than youd ever imagine during our growing up days. We didnt need friends for we were best buddies, always together. But as we go along in life, we started drifting apart. How I secretly wish that never happened. Muhammad Hardy Bin Abdul Aziz (Abg Didi) - Today marks exactly a month since youre gone. Hasnt been a day that Ive forgotten about you. You left us all, you left your dreams, family and your two beautiful daughters. You are so blessed to have them, especially Raeann who is so smart and well-mannered. I still remember all the advices youve given me and have always kept them close to my heart. I listened to you and now, I truly am a happy man. Its just sad knowing that if I were to get married one day, you will not be around to share my happiness. But just so you know, all of us cousins promise to stick together and have each others back. Just like old times. Things have changed for the better now and I pray that it remains. My dearest cousin, you will always be remembered, and always in our prayers. Inshaa Allah.
Posted on: Tue, 25 Nov 2014 08:49:00 +0000
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