7 ISSUES THAT MAKE OR BREAK RELATIONSHIPS/MARRIAGE FUNDAMENTAL QUESTIONS FOR BUILDING A STRESS-FREE RELATIONSHIP By John Mawudem Micheals Sometimes, I wonder why relationships don’t just work. I have shared this article at some Singles Fellowships. During my talk in one of the seminars, a brother said, the westernization and not the modernization that we have adopted, has affected the way to behave in our relationships. He mentioned the instances of our parents in their days who were given out without too much details, but enjoyed their marriage more that our westernized relationships and marriages. I personally have a challenge with that – because most of our mothers became toys in the hands of our fathers. Our mothers lived the description of our fathers rather than fulfilling God’s calling and purpose for their lives. But they achieved the ‘seemingly’ success and fulfillment in their marriage because the wives understood the place of “TOTAL” submission to the husband and the man understood the place of the LOVING HEAD of the family. Today, I want to share with us on some things or issues that make or break a relationship. After a mutual respect, attraction and verbal commitment is established, gradually discuss these issues. I will take time in my subsequent articles, to detail these issues. NO. 1: HOW DO CULTURE, TRIBE, PARENTS AND RELATIVES OPINIONS... INFLUENCE YOUR CHOICE OF PARTNER? I believe there is no tribe in the world known to raise bad husbands or bad wives. It is a different case, if you don’t like a tribe because of their practices or traditions – but condemning a tribe on assumption is not really good. a) Have you dated someone outside your tribe or country Nigerian before? b) What happens when your people say you cant marry the person you love because he is from a particular place… or they dont like him...? NO. 2: HOW DO MONEY AND MATERIAL THINGS (FINANCE) INFLUENCE YOUR CHOICE OF PARTNER? Money! Cars! Houses! Good jobs! Good wears! I think those are things that about 80% of our ladies want these days – it is either we the guys rise up to it and are accepted or we live our hardworking modest life and get one of the remaining 20% that will accept us because we are in the making. a) What would the man or woman possess at least... to be accepted by you..? b) Are you for The-Made or The-One-In-The-Making man/woman? NO. 3: CAN YOU DATE OR MARRY A FIDEL OF ANOTHER RELIGION (ISLAM FOR EXAMPLE), IF THE PERSON POSSESSES EVERY OTHER GENUINE QUALITY APART FROM JUST RELIGION? It is a pity that despite all we hear in church or mosque about not being unequally yoked with an unbeliever, many of us still consider settling down with a Muslim or vice versa. A good relationship must begin with the admiration of the spiritual values we share together. Did you read that? Relationships are beyond the physical things that attract us – even though they are good. Let me give it to you straight. A true Christian that believe that Jesus is his/her Saviour and Lord, the Son of God, he died for his/her sins and was raised from the dead and is coming back to him/her home CAN NOT marry a Muslim that does not believe firmly in any of those earlier mentioned. Who is an unbeliever? He/she is not someone that does not believe in anything but that individual that DOES NOT BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN – full stop. And I dare to say that no true practicing Muslim will marry a Christian. It is A FULL BLOWN NONSENSE for women to believe that they don’t have a religion. We are individually answerable to God. Listen to me my friend, if you are happy and grounded in your faith, you will want to grow and raise your family in it. What picture do you have of your family? A family where the father is honestly saying BISIMILAHI RAHMAN RAHEEM, ALHAMDULIHAI RABINA ALAMIN and the wife is saying - JESUS, I THANK YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE MY SAVIOUR, THE KING OF KINGS, THE LAMB THAT IS SEATED ON THE THRONE, THE PRINCE OF PEACE... You go to church or mosque and your spouse is heading the other direction. I think it is nice to a spiritual harmony at home. Make a choice or change totally to the other religion if you think your faith is not good enough. [Watch out for your PART II]. Grab your copy nooooooow! lol.. Follow me on BB and whastapp: Pin:3338CFA3 Whatsapp: 08033491000
Posted on: Tue, 25 Nov 2014 12:32:27 +0000
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