A week ago today an event took place in my life that truly got me thinking, most know the outcome what you didnt know is that there were two other children here that night I too was actually arrested hand cuffs and all fortunately the police officers let me kiss my kids goodbye, after I was in the car, I did not get charged they could Cleary see self defense I was released, told to go to a shelter but I had cas you heard it cas aprove being home if someone was here. I can now be here on my own. ALOT of you know that he does suffer illness what you dont know is thathe got so bad that at somepoint he made me believe I was crazy and needed meds short lived though a good friend snapped me out of it, what you dont know is that 90% of the time everything was amazing better then anything id ever experienced, Amethyst even bought him a card for fathers day this year and wrote to dad, pretty cool. Truth is because of great friends if I knew his illness was bad I could send my kids for the night, I thank so many for their support he has done terrible things to me especially telling lies and pming close friends about me, thAt is how bad he wanted to hurt me. Just me hearing it wasnt enough, I watched him have no control many times mostly psychological and verbal , I never cheated. I was witness to mental illness at its worst, I am not naive most of you know I was on a waiting ro list for leaf so I could learn coping tools for living with mental illness I watched his doctor play with his meds and sat in appointments I watched him break down a few a times in the last couple weeks crying so hard praying for help he could feel himself getting worse.back to the doctors and nothing.We are not allowed to communicate he showed me so many signs that I now am just seeing . I have decided that even though I dont have to go court as im not the one charging him im going to. I kept a journal of changes the last few months this man doesnt need jail he needs help. I know the man I fell in love with the only father in this house and the last six months not him and it went down fairly quick , I was on a waiting list now I start next week. He did terrible things but had no control he is mentally ill severely right now, by the way same timeline as when they took him off meds. And noone needs to worry im fully confident this is what it is and if anyone is worried well he will get assessed if im wrong tgey will know, but im not. I am going to councelling and then becoming a mental health worker to go with my psychology their simple is not enough awareness
Posted on: Thu, 07 Aug 2014 00:02:22 +0000
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