AMEBOR STORY (strictly pidgin) For this our yard ehn, i still dey reason why my yard people dey look me like juju. I nor dey thief oh, but anytime i pass, something must miss and wen i enter my room, i go see the tin for my body or bag. (Mak una no ask me anytin abeg) Mama Joe na my neighbor, she too dey like carry my mata for head. Her husband no dey live with us for yard now, the man travel for peacekeeping mission. So na only her dey house and Joe her pikin dey boarding school Yesterday afternoon, i just dey my own for yard o, naso mama Joe come meet me with solid voke, dey halla for me say who carry her pot of jollof rice when dey fire..me look her i no see wetin to tell her. (Na money yab me now. If not how babe like me wey set die go dey live for this kind yard? Me wen Akeem wan kill himsef for, No be my mate dey live for flat?) Naso i tell her say i no see any pot oh, talkless of d pot wen jollof rice dey inside. B4 i know wetin dey happen, mama Joe don tear me slap. Haaaaaaaaaa for my mind i say na me dis woman fall e hand? Naso me sef tear am 2 beta crested slap wen carry weight. Omo na there i do mistake, if to say i know, i for no try am. See gobe me nor sabi say mama Joe go school wen dem dey learn fight and nobody gree seperate us for yard, instead dem just draw big circle for me and mama Joe, come leave us inside the circle. D kind beating wen mama Joe gimme ehn, i neva see am for my life b4. She beat me sotey my two legs wey straight just become 2left leg. I no get choice nah, so i still folo her dey dig am. We fite soteyyyyy we come seperate ourself by oursef as we tire. For evenning wen yard people wey go work come back from work, naso she begin cast for yard say i thief her food and she beat me like madwoman. See as compound people dey laff me for yard. I no talk. E get this boy wen dem dey call oga Mathias for we yard, d guy and mama Joe too dey quarrel for small tin wen no reach anytin. Today now, for afternoon, i no too tight like dat, konji hold me naim i say make i stroll reach Akeem side. Wen i dey comot for yard na mama Joe dey yard, she been dey wash cloth. I no hold side at all, shingbai no gum me so i trek go Akeem place, i reach there i no see am, i call am for phone say where he dey, shebi i don call am b4 i enta road and i tell am make he iron he pr*ck down with enof gator wait for me. Mumu Akeem tel me say make i dey go back to my yard unless i promise to dash am the phone wen Dr Olu gimme wen he return from Australia. Naso i vex say wetin? Infact my kintis no need he alignment again, i go go my house go click my mouse by mysef. Wetin coke bottle dey for? Naso i still carry my mumu sef go back house. Me and mama Joe room face oursef....so as i reach yard na, make i enter my room, i nor sabi wetin even carry my eye go mama Joe doormot o, i just see say her door dey lock and her window dey open. I sabi say she nor dey ever lock her door, naso i rush comot my fone, say incase person dey thief for her house, i go record am for my hot fone wen Dr Olu buy for me from Australia. . . .as i reach mama Joe window, i nearly blind. Wait wetin i dey zoom so? Oga Mathias and mama Joe dey limpopo? Heyyyyyyy naso i no look dem becos if i look dem i no go fit video dem well, so i begin use my fone video dey look dem. Heyyyyy mama Joe nawa o, she carry oga Mathias dey do newspaper. Oga Mathias sef no get action, mama Joe just dey whine, twist bounce her nyansh anyhow give oga Mathias, and d mumu man sef just dey shout...mamam J you go kill me today, mama J you too sabi, kai you even sabi pass mama Roy (for my mind i say ehnnn, oga Mathias dey sample mama Roy for dis yard? Mam Roy na our landlord wife oh) mama J your head bam wella. (For my mind say shuu see oga Mathias wen dey always form actor for me o, so he lazy like dis, he no even fit stand my Akeem) small time o, mama Joe just comot oga Mathias rod from her kintis, come begin tak am do lollypop. Naso she lick am from side to side, dey swallow d tin ehn, oga Mathias sef just dey halla like mad dog, mama J i wan cum oh, i wan cum oh, mama J hold me, hold me abeg.....i come say hmmm show don nearly finish so i off d camera of my fone. Waka comot for mama Joe window. I come sidon for my doormot, e no reach 10mins oh, see as oga Mathias sneak come out for mama Joe room, as he just chook head come outside naso me hail am say oga Mathiassssssss nawa o, naso d go dey go abi? Una welldone oh. D guy wan melt, i just leave am enter my room. Now dis evenning oh, mama Joe come meet me say abeg mak i no vex for d jollof rice mata of 2days ago, say she dey beg me make i nor tell anybody say oga Mathias enter her house. I say make she gerrout jor. Naso she come vex say if i talk anyhow i go see anyhow. See me see local trouble oh, she nor sabi say i get she and oga Mathias for fone. I wan do her wetin go pain her, i wan disgrace her but i no know wetin to do. Abeg wetin una suggest?
Posted on: Tue, 29 Oct 2013 03:19:31 +0000
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