Adventures In Home Ownership Challenge: changing light bulbs, security lights Contestants: Sean (previous tenant, alleged drunkard and electrical hobbyist) Rilla (clueless but game) Because it would have been far too sensible and boring to have all four corner security lights be identical fixures, we have here four different types of fixtures and two different types of bulbs. (Sean must have been really drunk when he did this.) I should also note that while one of the four switches near the side door apparently turns these security lights on and off, there is also a switch that does so.... in the upstairs bedroom. Dont ask me why. There are several electrical switches in this place that I *still* havent figured out WTF they are supposed to go to. Fixture #1: The only one reachable with only a kitchen chair. The bulb is a CFL about the size of a rolling pin and it looks like it came from the engine room of the Starship Enterprise. Fred Meyer comes up empty. Lowes also comes up empty until the Electric Department Guy is tracked down and is able to find the bulb (which is not in the light bulb section, duh). Change bulb. Light works. Yay! Fixture #2: Barely reachable by climbing kichen chair, hanging over deck railing with ass out to the wind and attempting to ply screwdriver with one hand while clinging to window frame with other hand. The casing is full of (cold) water (wonder if that has anything to do with malfunction, hmmmm), which runs right down sleeve, into armpit and then down pants as homeowner unscrews plastic cover with agonzing slowness. Bulb (which is wet and covered with green slime) is the same Starship rolling pin as in Fixture #1. Upon changing bulb, homeowner is able to screw the casing back together but finds arms are not long enough to re-secure the fixture to the side of the house without plunging to a painful death. Forced to leave it hanging there by the wires until a 2-story + ladder can be borrowed. Oh, and when the switch is flipped, the light does not turn on (which is not exactly a huge surprise). Fixture #3: Requires borrowing a ladder from neighbor. After puzzling out how to screwdriver the casing open, this bulb is discovered to be a finger-long little cylindrical thing with no discernable method of removal. After much wiggling, prying, and cursing, defeat is acknowledged. Fixture #4: Ladder again. Different fixture, different mystery of trying to open casing. Once open, we are presented with an identical cyclindrical bulb which is no easier to remove than previous. (Joy.) Cumulative loss of patience results in eventual removal of 1/2 of the bulb. Final score, Security Light Challenge: Sean 3, Rilla 1 Stay tuned for....... Adventures In Home Ownership; challenge: Changing Furnace Filters. What surprises has Sean left lying in wait for us in the furnace closet? Grab your toolbox and lets find out!
Posted on: Thu, 18 Dec 2014 17:41:06 +0000
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