Afterthoughts of my morning treasure time... Oh how I repented for not treasuring Christ in every area as these trials have worn me down. While Im experiencing more victory as the waves of confusion and sadness come on. (I really dont have adequate words to describe it.) I dont completely understand the source so Ive spent far too much mental energy trying to figure out why this is happening. I repented of this also. If Christ in His wisdom wanted me to understand He would show me. Instead He is requiring trust. Trusting in Him with all my heart and leaning not to my own understanding (proverbs 3:5-6). So I bowed down and spoke out every feeling to Him. Then I asked the Holy Spirit recall to my mind every Truth hidden in my heart that would bring peace, clarity, hope and strength to persevere during this strange season. I needed an anchor for the waves of my emotions threatening to carry me out to despair. Im being painfully honest and transparent. Not so I can gain sympathy but so that some of you who are experiencing the same sort of trials might relate and be encouraged. (And his Word tells me that my brothers and sisters throughout the earth are undergoing the same sort of sufferings). Heres where I landed. My feelings are just that. FEELINGS. Many times they are not grounded in or sifted thru Truth. So in His great mercy He has left us His Word. A sure foundation in our ever-changing circumstances...and thoughts...and persecutions...and trials. So I build my life on the foundation of His Truth. On the Rock that never moves. I spend myself and use my energy to search out, memorize, meditate on the Truth that will ALWAYS show me the right path to take. And when my feelings contradict that I choose to forget them. I choose not to dwell on them. I submit them to Gods Truth. And I trust that His Word will not fail me. Im so tired and weary of this attack on my emotions. The enemy is taking full advantage of me being in a foreign land...away from everything that is familiar. Hes trying his hardest to get a foothold because I do not have the many weekly, corporate gatherings with other believers. People that I have had deep, intimate relationships with for years. Hes trying his best to plant seeds of discouragement thru sickness...thru missing loved ones...thru my lack of patience in planting a church in a culture far different from mine...and many things not going as planned in this process. Just as the tempter tempted Jesus in the wilderness and Adam and Eve in the garden thru twisting Gods words. God said...Did God REALLY say... He is using the same tactics with me (and some of you reading this). We must know and be firm and confident in what God has said. His word and promises dont change. They stay the same thru out the ages. So WHEN THE DAY OF EVIL COMES (not if it comes...WHEN it comes) we can stand our ground (Ephesians 6:13). This morning as I poured out my feelings to God and brought my temptations to give into fear, worry, guilt, shame, doubt...settle into self-pity...I made a choice to submit every one of those feelings to God. And then He flooded my mind with Truth. I flipped thru the pages of my bible to see the Truth and read it a fresh. I quoted out loud the reliable words of God hidden in my heart. And you know what...peace came. And you know why...because He promised it would. When we submit ourselves to God and resist the devil he must flee from us. And after we have suffered a little while He will make us strong, firm and steadfast. If we dont make Gods word a priority we will not be able to withstand the onslaught of the temptations and attacks from our spiritual enemy. But if we commit all our ways to Him and seek Him with our whole heart He will make us strong and courageous. Even the weakest of us, like me. Some of you may read my posts and think Im strong. Im not. For years I was a slave to my feelings and desires. I attached myself to every sinful thing I thought would fill in all the empty places of my heart. Today HE ALONE is filling in those empty places with His Spirit. He has taken me, the lowly, uneducated, fatherless, sinful woman and proven HIMSELF STRONG thru me. So I might be a display of HIS splendor. So I might be living, breathing proof that He uses the weak and foolish things to confound the wise. Today I am an overcomer because of what He did on the Cross. Today I can take heart in my emotional troubles because He has overcome the world by his death and resurrection. Today, because He chose to lay down His life, His Spirit lives inside of me and makes me righteous...to the point that even when I stumble I wont fall because He upholds me with His mighty hand. Why do I share this with you? Because Im certain many of you struggle with the same things that every person has struggled with since sin entered the world thru Adam and Eve. And today I want you to be encouraged that Christ is our True reality. Not our feelings. His Word is the anchor for our soul no matter what our circumstances are. Run to Him. Take refuge in Him until the storm passes. Be strong and courageous. Take heart. He is sovereign and in control! He is for you, not against you. He is fighting every battle for you. The victory has already been won. There is an end to your trial. Nothing is wasted. Perseverance, character, hope and trust are being produced in you. He loves you deeply no matter how you FEEL. But Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen. (1 Peter 5:6-11 NIV)
Posted on: Wed, 04 Jun 2014 11:01:10 +0000
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