As I grew to what psychologists refer to as the double bind type, my sensei told me, Shayan, there will always be someone out there who is better than you. My heart accepted this immediately as my chest burst open, my thoughts scrambling. And at the time I began to think what if...... someone on this earth will have to be better than anyone; the best!..... In my mind, in the midst of disbelieving these inquiries, I realized that being the best had nothing to do with being better than others. It had to do with already being the version of myself that I wanted to be, that I was passionate about. This developed into the idea of being honest with myself about where I was at and what I am feeling. Accepting myself as a winner and as a loser. Because without accepting that loss is an idea- just as winning- how could I see through my ignorance of the purpose of choosing this as an experience for myself? I saw that the key in being the best, was accepting the reality completely. Through these means, I could accept myself totally, utilizing my freedom to be in the moment-to-moment mirror of relationship.
Posted on: Sat, 12 Apr 2014 17:21:09 +0000
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