Attended the Transgender Day of Remembrance service at Hartfords Metropolitan Community Church last night. The takeaways: * The list of names of known transpeople killed around the world the past year is, if I remember right, 233. Or is it 323? Either way, thats 233 or 323 more than there should be. And the number is higher this year than the previous year. * Many of the people killed were from Brasil. Also quite a few from the Popes home country, Argentina, as well as Mexico -- all heavily Roman Catholic countries. I hope Francis, who has come out with damn-near radical stances on gays as compared to his right-wing predecessors, will do the same for transpeople. * I felt a strong sense of not belonging, one that overwhelmed me at some point following the service. Now, granted, this was a church-based group, in an open and affirming church, and the people were very nice and extremely welcoming. And, may I add, considering how many transpeople out there are so goddamned judgmental toward each other (those who belong to the Facebook Transgender Alliance page or go to trans nights at clubs or live in San Francisco fully know what Im talking about), these people, both transfolks and allies, were quite non-judgmental. But still, I felt as if I didnt really belong there -- though I did to the extent that, because the more people who turn out and honor those whose lives were cut short, the more awareness there will be among the masses of what goes on out there. And the longer Im in this game, the more I feel I belong in the world at large than in the trans non-community. Which makes me sad. Because, hand-in-hand with the violence waged against transfolks goes the last frontier of civil rights. I mean the discrimination that many transpeople face, be it on the job front or being unable to change their birth certificates, or housing, or the goober states that pass bathroom bills. And none of these things will ever be eradicated as long as transpeople are shunted to the side, either by our representatives in Congress (try getting Rosa DeLauros people to respond, for example) or by the people who are allegedly working for our causes. I couldnt tell you one person who is working for trans equality; Im game for working for this, but I couldnt even tell you a single person whos working for equality. Thats how disconnected we all are on a fundamental level. (And the one place where I did interview three years ago, for a publicist job at the Transgender Law Center when it was based in SF, left me on the hook for eight weeks afterward and then had the secretary send me a form rejection. That told me a lot about them.) I did talk to a couple of people last night who were really cool, and did mingle among a few people were were very nice. And as long as, sadly, there are people who need to be memorialized, Ill attend such remembrance services. But the alienation Ive felt for some time just inexplicably worked its way to the surface last night. I dont belong. Except to you in the real world whove accepted me. And heres to hoping for the day when no one dies for how they were born.
Posted on: Fri, 21 Nov 2014 23:03:45 +0000
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