Can you all please help me compile a list of convenient & - TopicsExpress

Can you all please help me compile a list of convenient & genuinely insulting, but still currently PC epithets for me to use upon others, & most importantly upon myself? For instance, for more than 30 years, ive been in the habit of punching myself in the head multiple times each day while screaming RETARD!!! RETARD!!! RETARD!!! But it seems like the R word is off the table now. I occasionally call me an Idiot, but despite being fewer letters, the extra syllable sometimes makes it unwieldy. Stupid doesnt work because im already mostly committed to using it as term of endearment for various non-smart quadrupeds im affectionate with, & moron just seems too euro. (no offense to my friends from across the ocean)

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