Cancer update: Sorry Im so late with this--I had promised an update last week after my first oncology appointments, but I like to write updates in a positive mood, and it was somewhat hard for me to summon one after the appts. Not that they were bad! Everything is proceeding well--the planned whole breast radiation (28 days of 180 rads and a 1-2k rads boost at the end) and medicine (tamoxifen for 5 years) should reduce the chance of reoccurrence to 2% or 3%, which sounds pretty good to me. Sad One: A decision on biological children I was down after the appts because Im childless and part of me had always dreamed motherhood would happen for me one day. Ive been told since childhood Karen, youll make such a good mother some day! However, the tumor I had was stimulated by estrogen (ductal carcinoma in situ DCIS comedo with necrosis ER+95%/PR+90%). Estrogen is basically tumor food if any of those abnormal cells still reside in my body (likely, since the ductal system is a network, like a trees roots, hence why Im going with prone whole breast radiation, to zap anything still in the effected ductal system). Tamoxifen, a drug that plugs up the estrogen receptors in cells, has other effects on the role of estrogen in the body, and pregnancy is one of those functions--doctors want child-bearing age patients on two forms of birth control to prevent pregnancy during treatment. Five years from now, after my course of tamoxifen is over Ill be 45--really, pretty darn late to be considering my eggs as viable, and I also have the complication of endometriosis and ovarian cysts, which were part of my fertility issues to begin with. For this, and a few other reasons, Ive had to make the decision about having biological children pretty abruptly (though years of not treating infertility are kind of a decision in and of themselves). That was hard, even though Id been sort of bracing myself for the decision since I was diagnosed with endometriosis in June. Sad Two: No Harry Potter Universal Studios trip The other reason for my low mood seems silly, but since radiation is five days a week, I wasnt going to be able to visit Universal Studios Harry Potter with my mom and sisters as planned in late January. Statistics show that waiting until after the trip to get radiation (8 weeks from surgery) was a bad idea, and starting radiation three weeks after surgery is recommended according to a recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine. So I had to make that decision too, which meant missing out on experiencing it with my mother, who I very much wanted to show the park to (Moms 78). However, my wonderfully creative and practical sisters put their heads together and decided we would all move our trip if I couldnt come, but perhaps I could come for just the weekend, if my radiologist agreed. So I asked permission, and not only can I go for a weekend, I can go for a three day weekend!!! I bought my new ticket and will fly out to meet my family on a Friday right after radiation and fly back in time for a Tuesday afternoon radiation. Ill be 4 weeks into treatment by then, and likely be both sore and tired, so Im sure mom will jog circles around me, but Ill still get to go and enjoy the park with her and my sisters. WHEW. Stupid and silly how much I was wanting to go and how very much that raised my spirits. Future challenges: Flexibility and a strong immune system My lower back cramped pretty badly during my prone pre-radiation CT scan (I now have six tattoos--permanent blue dots to help them target the radiation) and Ill need to find a solution to that in order to hold very still in the same position day after day during radiation throughout January. Ill be on my stomach with the effected body party handing through a D-shaped hole on a little pink padded upward-tilting ramp (not quite a revers Minbari sleeping platform, but hey, the same jokes apply). My backs not used to bending that way, so when I got up I just about fell over. I freaked the nurses out by going into downward facing dog right away and it helped considerably. Ill be trying to get back into yoga practice over the next week or so. Ive also got to find a way to reduce stress so my immune system can keep me well during radiation, but end of the semester/beginning of the semester challenges will make that difficult. Yoga should help there too--yes, I know its not a cure all, but I love how I feel when Im doing yoga and exercising regularly. Which brings me to the challenge of resuming an overall healthy lifestyle, which Ive had ups and downs with over the last five years. However, Ive been better about nutrition and exercise than I was when I was a young person, so hopefully Im slowly gaining enough wisdom and experience to reach life-long fitness. Anyway, theres the update. Summary: Im fine, and Ill probably continue to be as fine as other humans, and this has been a bit of an emotional roller coaster, but making decisions and moving forward is freeing. Love you all and wishing you the very best of holidays, Karen Attached are some images of the prone breast board system. Im quite a bit taller than the average woman, so my back actually bends backward because of the slope of the board. Also, I wont be able to wear a cute little black outfit. Its the flappy hospital robe for me! Ill just have to pretend Marcus and Ivanova are cracking jokes with me and that Im on the White Star....
Posted on: Wed, 24 Dec 2014 19:28:44 +0000
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