Children Together 4 You Shall Be Known The naming of Katie J proved to be a challenge. She was already born on July 27, 1987 (which would forever after be condensed to 7 27 87) at 7:06p.m. P. J. has always wondered why Karen could not have had the insight to wait until 7:07, but insight is not a negotiable quantity between labor and management, especially when it is the woman who is in labor. If much has been written about the naming of children I am neither going to quote any sources here, nor am I going to make any footnotes to cite examples. Often little really matters to people until whatever it is they should have been concerned about happens to them. For example, for feeding infants there are many pamphlets, books, audio tapes and video guides. When Kent was born his proud parents diligently followed the instructions of the current pediatric sage: all bottles and nipples shall be boiled. Upon Kathryn’s birth her more experienced parents would prepare the bottles and nipples by running them under hot tap water. By the time Jerome came along whoever was going to feed him cleaned the nipple by putting it in his or her own mouth first and then giving it to the hungry child. Maybe Katie J did have a problem with her first name. It was not something her parents had intended. They had thought about Karter until a character in a sit-com who was named Carter proved to be so unlikeable that the name immediately and forever lost its appeal. So P. J. and Karen decided to name her after her Great-grandmother and her Aunt. What proved difficult for their daughter was how she would move through society wondering if anyone was ever going to spell her first name correctly. If her parents knew one thing for certain, it was when it came time to commit Katie J’s statistics to that most sacrosanct of civilian documents, the birth certificate, everything—everything would be properly recorded and witnessed. Katie J was to learn that her father’s family had experienced some difficulty with the contents of certain family members’ birth certificates. Her grandfather E. H. had discovered that his first name had been incorrectly cited and he had to go to great lengths to get his certificate amended. Such dilemmas were common in the naming of Katie J’s grandfather. Great-grandmother Kathryn had declared to her husband B. F. that their son would be known as Elbert Howard; B. F. simply nodded and said that was fine, but that he was always going to call him “Pete.” Katie J’s grandmother Doris found that her maiden name was listed with a different spelling. Her Uncle Kent was amazed to learn that according to his birth certificate both E. H. and Doris were “Black” although he himself was Caucasian. All these documents looked most official and detailed, but for all that the birth certificates were wrong. Aunt Kathryn and Jerome had birth certificates that looked as real as the paper lining under the glass of a dollar picture frame, but the seal on both was properly raised and all information therein was accurate. The immediate problem was with Katie J’s middle name. What would they call her? On Karen’s side of the family Lee was a common name. Karen also thought fondly of her grandmother Josie. So whom would they honor with that middle name? Another urgent question was when was P. J. going to leave the hospital and pick up Buddy so Karen could get some rest? I will not discuss what Buddy first felt about the idea of having a little sister. I would not want to give anything away. With problem of what to fill in for his daughter’s full name on the birth certificate still bothering him, P. J. arrived at the hospital early the next morning, eager to discuss the options with Karen. Mother and child were resting comfortably in bed. “I got here early so we could get her birth certificate recorded,” P. J. said proudly to show that he was ready to solve this enigma together with his wife. “Say good morning to our daughter, Kathryn Joleen, dear.”
Posted on: Mon, 21 Oct 2013 06:42:43 +0000