Choosing to despise someone because of their choices is ignorant and hypocritical, because you are choosing to despise someone, rather than understand them. If despising someone for accidents of nature, things they didnt choose, like their skin, doesnt make sense, then consider how in addition to not choosing their race, people dont choose their parents, their culture, their language, the ideas they were exposed to... but we could say, yeah but they chose to believe such-and-such-ignorant-thing, and chose to remain in their ignorance... But, the nature of beliefs is that they are not chosen, they are imposed; at first by external means, but then as symbols become internalized, beliefs become self imposed. and thus it may not actually be an option for a person to become aware of what they are ignorant. A better strategy than getting annoyed when someone behaves differently, or holds dissimilar beliefs or values, might be to seek to understand why that person holds those beliefs or behaves the way they do. when we despise something we are expressing our own ignorance of that thing. if we see a better way then it is our responsibility to present our understanding in as relatable and persuasive a manner as possible. a good rule of thumb that applies to criticisms as well as compliments is that; any time you point your finger to say something, you may as well be pointing at your reflection in the mirror. seek first to understand, then to be understood. when one says I dont get why... such-and-such, or I dont get... so-and-so, notice that they are initially pointing at the correct source of the perceived problem. Notice though where their expression immediately goes wrong and turns to blame that lack of understanding on the person who is the subject to being not understood. Did we seek for understanding? did we even attempt to get it from them before we blame them for our lack of it? as though they unjustly denied us our right to understand them, and are thus the guilty party and must make restitution of our understanding? we are not acknowledging or own part in contributing to this poverty of understanding. we do not see our own complicity in ignorance. anyone caught in this hypocritical loop cannot be blamed, it becomes the responsibility of those who do have understanding to break the cycle. an example of this might be in the way we judge each other on the way we dress. do we express ourselves through our dress, our speech? is one expression more fake or superficial than another? No, it cannot be, because whether you dress well, or intentionally do not focus on your external appearance, you are expressing your internal clustering of values. And so each person expresses their values equally well. and yet, when they come into contact, both the person who dresses well, and the person who intentionally pays no attention to their dress, will congratulate themselves on the superiority of their own values. Just as while writing this I am congratulating myself for my astute observations. I love myself for how I value open-mindedness and seek understanding rather than judgment and condemnation. LOL ~Calvin~
Posted on: Sun, 27 Oct 2013 17:12:25 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015