Continuando con la lista de ayer, otras 50 :P 51. No longer allowed to use the time machine for booty calls. 52. My bard does not know how to play Inna Godda Davida on marachas. 53. Not allowed to start a drow character weighing more than a quarter ton. 54. Cannot pimp out other party members. 55. Before facing the dragon, not allowed to glaze the elf. 56. No matter how well I roll, a squirrel cannot carry a horse and rider at full sprint. 57. In the middle of a black op I cannot ask a guard to validate parking. 58. Expended ammunition is not a business expense. 59. Not allowed to pose the Netrunner in embarrassing positions when hes on a run. 60. Not allowed to short sheet the bedroll of impotent deities. 61. Can only taunt the ranger about his lack of swimming after my USCG E8 saves him. 62. I am not allowed to do anything I saw Han Solo do once. 63. No, I cannot buy 10,000 marbles even if I say please. 64. My paladins battle cry is not Good for the Good God 65. There is no Summon Bimbo spell. 66. Not allowed to start a character that speaks every language except ones the party speaks. 67. There is no Kung Fu manuever McGuire Swings For Bleachers 68. Bring him back intact includes redundant organs. 69. There is more to wizardry than magic missile. Even if I can do 200 damage automatic with no save. 70. Not allowed to cook up nerve gas in the sink even if the target number is 5. 71. There is no annoy setting on a phasor 72. Not allowed to start a character who is over 100 years old unless hes an elf or dwarf. Humans are right out. 73. Not allowed to name my cudgel Ceremonial Whoopass Stick. 74. My thiefs battle cry is not Run And Live 75. Nor is it You take care of the orcs, I take care of the traps 76. I am not allowed any artistic license while translating. 77. I did not get my super powers from James T. Kirk. 78. Not allowed to commission a pistol that costs more than a sedan. 79. I am not liquid metal. 80. When accepting a challenge for a duel, I must allow the other guy time to find a pistol. 81. A picture of my ex-wife is not an acceptable backup weapon. 82. Victory laps after killing the dragon with my 1d2 bow is considered in poor taste. 83. My gnome does not like big butts and he cannot lie. 84. Not allowed to talk my fellow inquisitors into buying a 220lb pull crossbow. 85. Not allowed to talk my fellow inquisitors into buying an industrial strength flamethrower. 86. Not allowed to make a superhero with a 99% chance of dodging even after the -10 penalty for a successful called shot. 87. There is no such thing as a dwarven katana. 88. My bard does not get a bonus to perform if she is obviously not wearing anything under her tabard. 89. The elfs name is not Legolam. 90. My swashbuckling fop cannot take the flaw Dark Secret: Not Gay 91. A wet towel does not constitute an improvised weapon. 92. The name of the weapon shop is not Bloodbath and Beyond 93. I am to remind my DM that he must never, ever give my paladin a dire boar for a mount again. 94. I cannot base my ancient kung fu master on neither Gene Simmons or Bluto Blutarski. 95. I must not put the Thunder God on the spot again. 96. No making up polearms. 97. My one wish cannot be I wish everything on this piece of paper was true 98. There is no such thing as Speed Polka. 99. Not allowed to see if Jedi can parry a shotgun blast with their lightsaber. 100. When any character from a d20 sourcebook is allowed, that doesnt include System Lords.
Posted on: Thu, 16 Jan 2014 20:53:55 +0000
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