Conversation with the maintenance guy, Topic: Teenage Wasteland Me: Well look who wandered in today! MG: Gonna wanduh right intuh yuh office if thats ok. Gotta check up on muh boys out theya. (My office overlooks a courtyard where maintenance workers have been cleaning, doing landscaping and a power washer is being used to clean moss off of brick) Me: You want to spy on your guys for a bit? MG: Just a bit, gotta make sure Numb and Numma are doin theya jobs. Me: Well the landscapers have been working hard for sure, the power washer guy only just got going. MG: Well, I gotta keep an eye on him. Hes kinda new, not too bright. Got him excited tuh wuk with a gas powered squirt gun though. (we watch for a few moments, MG gets up and heads out side) MG: JESUS KEERIST, how long ya gonna blast that pawticulah brick?! Its clean, move on. Yuh gotta get the whole cotyahd done. (something unintelligible from worker) MG: Uh-huh. You know a brick is red, right? The moss is green. When theya is no ma green move on. (he comes back in) MG: Im gettin too old fuh this shit. Its like whats goin on at home with muh boy. Me: Whats goin on there? MG: So I come home and asked the boy tuh mow the lawn and he gives me a bit of lip, says he is playin his x box.. I tell him tuh get his ass out theya and get the lawn mowed. He does. When he is done he comes in and sits right in front of the teevee and stahts in with the x box again. I had more things for him tuh do but he said he didnt want to. So I said to him maybe I dawnt feel like taking you to yaw race this weekend. We had a big argument about it. Me: how did it all turn out. MG: Well, I tell you ... I nevuh had this much trouble with muh dawtuh but the boy, hed drive me tuh drink if I wasnt sobuh. We got arguin about chaws and responsibilities around the house. I told him if he wants me tuh keep takin him tuh races and on the boat with me on weekends he has tuh do what we need him tuh do around the house. Then he told me I couldnt tell him what to do with his xbox cuz he paid for it. Me: What did you say? MG: I said the xbox may be yaws but the teevee is mine! So he took his xbox upstairs and played it on his itty bitty teevee up theya. Me: Were you ok with that? MG: Course not! I told him that just because he was in his room doesnt mean he can do whatevah he wants. He said he could and locked himself in theya with his xbox, a bag of bread, some peanut buttah and a jar uh fluff. Me: oh yeah?! What did you do? MG: I went down to the breakuh box, cut the powuh to his room. Me: REALLY!? MG: Course I did. He comes right down and flips it back on. But I solved that problem. Me: How? MG: I put a pad lock on the breakuh box. He can have his xbox that he paid fuh he just cant have the power that I am payin fuh!
Posted on: Wed, 10 Sep 2014 15:45:50 +0000
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