Dear God, Heart of My Heart, Joy of My Joy, Love of My Love, Out of the depths I cry unto You, O Lord. Hear my voice. I am shaken to my core. If I could roll back the clock and bring ____ back, Look in his eyes and tell him, once more, how grateful I am That he was in my life, I would. Yet, though I might weep at his grave until the end of my days, He shall not return to me here. What thought, what words have meaning for me now? For this is unbearable and I feel broken. Dear God, is there any sense to his death? For I cannot believe he was taken from me without purpose. I do not want to believe he has been deliberately cruel in his leaving me, for he was never cruel, never unkind. I know you are Pure Love, so it cannot be that you have allowed him to leave with no thought of the shock and pain that would fill me upon his leaving. Neither can I believe his passing has been whim or chance. There is purpose in all things, all events. Yet my pain is so deep. I am so afraid. I feel so lost and so very alone. Give me courage to express the agony of my grief, Keep me safe as it flows through me. Hold me in Your arms as I release it to You. Make your Presence known to me. Lift me up so I can feel Your Love; So I can understand and be comforted by Your Great Goodness. If there is a purpose and a meaning to my grief, Open my being to your loving wisdom so I understand what You understand. If there is a higher purpose for his leaving; if my beloved’s work here was truly done; if I can, somehow, become more loving because of this; if I can, somehow, turn this terrible grief to good, then make me an instrument of that good. Help me see a way to go on, for ____, For his legacy and life, And for my own. May this loss And this pain Impart sacred meaning To my life and my purpose. May I feel this truth: That there is a Larger Plan And that I am an integral part of it. There are other hearts that grieve in this moment, Lord. Help me send love to them. Help me connect, in spirit, with them. If, one day, I can comfort others and help them make peace with loss and grief, I am willing to be Your messenger of love. Please lift me to that place of understanding. Help me, O Lord. My heart is in Your Hands. My life is in Your hands. My future is in Your hands. My ability to love is in Your hands. Comfort me and raise me up. Open my heart, for it wants to close. Open my inner eyes, for my eyes are blurred with tears. Help me draw upon the great love ____ gave me. Help me understand that, while he is gone from this world, he is not far away. Help me understand that, in his leaving this plane, he was not leaving me, But that something pressing called him And that, no matter how impossible it is to imagine, That some good great is destined to come out of this for me And let ____ know that I am strong. I am brave. I will recover. I will laugh and live again. Yet that does not mean I will ever forget him or stop loving him. I will love him forever and ever throughout eternity. Let him take the memory of my love with him wherever he must go And may it bring him unending joy. And so it is. Amen.
Posted on: Sat, 27 Jul 2013 11:39:33 +0000
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