Denial as a defense mechanism does not protect anyone but perpetuates hurt ~ Those who deny other people’s potential for bad behavior are putting themselves and their children at risk. They must open their eyes and face reality: They might wish it were otherwise, but bad people do exist, even in very responsible jobs. When people are inadvertently hurtful, calling them on their behavior will give them a chance to change their ways and to make amends. When people are deliberately hurtful or just don’t care, confronting them will bring out defensiveness or hostility, thereby revealing their true nature. Denying other people’s capacity for cruelty or thoughtlessness ultimately serves to perpetuate it. Acknowledging that bad people do exist will empower those who’ve been hurt to take much better care of themselves and their children. Furthermore, facing the truth will allow those on the receiving end to distinguish the occasionally inconsiderate from the chronically destructive. They will be able to do what they couldn’t as children: assert themselves, defend themselves or walk away from relationships which are neglectful or abusive. It may be disappointing and disillusioning to face the truth about someone’s hurtful actions, but it will prevent a lot of suffering, now and in the future. ~Marcia Sirota
Posted on: Mon, 28 Oct 2013 04:33:06 +0000
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