Encouraging Positive Behavior in the child ; Often when a child is misbehaving, we try to impose our own beliefs of how he should be acting or reacting before we truly try to understand the situation from his point of view. Rather than focusing on encouraging positive behavior, we tend to focus on discouraging bad behavior. Although it seems that both approaches would bring about the same desired results, the differences between encouragement and discouragement are great. Every person has a deep desire to belong. Encouragement develops feelings of love and makes the child feel he is capable. In contrast, discouraging remarks reinforce misbehavior. Statements such as “If you had tried harder,” “You are too little,” and “That is too hard; let me do it” reinforce a sense of unworthiness. In response, the child may think, “If you think I cannot do it, why should I try?” For a more positive result, try encouraging remarks, which by their nature enhance a positive sense of self and lead to a greater sense of dignity and cooperation. In the above scenario, what would make you feel better? Having an understanding partner who listens to your concerns and who helps when asked — maybe by taking the children to practice and picking up dinner on the way home? Providing a gentle hug and positive words? These are loving and encouraging ways that help you feel appreciated and capable of meeting tomorrow’s challenges. The same encouragement goes a long way in helping a child manage his own behavior. H.P
Posted on: Wed, 23 Oct 2013 05:35:38 +0000
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