Feelings from a life in a squeezed middle In the beginning from this voyage I had a goal - did not care about likes and all this self lifting nonsense - I was confident and had structure. Now I am in a fragile state - going from confident to confused in no time. As if I had a washing machine and a classmate had just returned back from across the Atlantic (living where there is no washing machine) and I want wash cause we can study together (the friend does not have underwear without skid marks - joke, but still no) - I would by nature offer my machine - symbiotic friendship. Well, we are all under stress, a new country, no close friends and on. Before I was a machine - up early took a run - got the Civil engineer babe with my broken clothes, lap top, and my healthy look (running +70k / week - not much nevertheless,, enough to keep in running shape and be invited to Studenternas at KTH) - while I still struggled with living and on. Still remember when she bought me a big meal of 200 g Hamburger, strips and a Trocadero. Was perfect friend with the best pizza place in Stockholm - the owners (middle east) loved that I wanted to go into Medicine - not as found with my interest in Math ( ha ha!). When I write this my tear ducts are flooding over and I miss the blond math babe with beautiful curly hair - cause everything I was fighting for came to perfect track - it meant that she was going with me abroad for Medical studies - and she could get a job in no time (contacts all over the world) and I could have good contact with my kids in a neutral environment (so was the plan - that sunny day in the southern part of Stockholm). Things happened, and I went over board struggling for my life - one side her and a baby - other side Medical school (that I am one of the few if not the only one from this trauma to reach). The storm came and afterwards no medical school nor girlfriend was in sight. Saw the motion picture Life of Pie* somewhere in the storm - connections. Just that now day every time when I am happy for a short time, I get reminded on her - she was a lady and the future was ours - I have now the special connections that got on this voyage - needed for the dream life - things only she knew about (yes, I keep it for my self and want to share it with you). Is wrong of me to have so deep feeling - cause after the accident I see life much more shiner and in the other end the darkness is coming. Victrix patientia duris - respond Penelope To Penelope, Skräpis, Trinity - same person https://youtube/watch?v=j9Hjrs6WQ8M
Posted on: Sun, 04 Jan 2015 00:10:59 +0000
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