Five simple rules for loving an intellectual, by B. Warner. 1) Give up on the notion than any argument/conversation will ever be truly over. While we may concede some points to you, we will never stop introducing news ideas and angles to the topic. You will get frustrated. Just play along. Having said that, we never shy away from admitting when we are wrong. If theres something that needs to be cleared up, we will initiate the conversation. We love to argue, but we love you more (most of the time). 2) While most relationships require the significant other to do things such as remember important dates, listen when we talk and split the household duties, your job will be simply to keep us alive! We are hypersensitive, tragic beings whos self destructive tendencies are matched only by our wanton desire for peace and love. When things are bad (anything from our flowers dying to world war) we will brood over all the things we couldve done to make it better. We will take it personally. Dont try to understand because we are in our own minds here. Just hide the sharp objects and wait it out. When things are good we are just as bad. We get over excited, drive too fast, drink too much and just dont know how to do moderation. We like to pick verbal fights and never back down from a good argument. However, others might not find this as amusing and will resort to more aggressive techniques. So, yes, forget about the mundane offices of relationships and prepare to be in crisis control pretty much all the time. Just keep us out of the psych ward and above ground and youve done all you could do. 3) Just go along with our strange quirks and fetishes. We are fascinated by languages. Its part of our DNA. The work Francophile was created for intellectuals, by intellectuals! We will be drawn to theoretical sciences like moths to a flame (and literature too; and will often use literary devices in our speaking and writing). *this last sentence is exactly the kind of sentence we would write! So, dont get turned off by our odd discussions of time travel, symmetry in nature or the probability of things. Dont think it silly when we speak to you in (insert language here) while doing the dishes or grocery shopping. And just accept the fact that some author/poet has had our heart since age 3 and youll never trump that. But we still love you! 4) Dont try to figure out what we like. The answer is everything! We rarely hit on a substantive topic that is not interesting to us on some level. We love nature and all the sciences that accompany. We love history, art, music, pretty much anything academic. But we will surprise you with some of the things that catch our brains. From Mozart to performance art; from any farms to bee hives; from Shakespeare to Langston Hughes; from Dadaism to the sand art tables at the county fair, we will be fascinated by it all. So, if you want to do something with us, just take your pick! Its easy to find something we will likely enjoy so, in that manner, feel free to surprise us! A benefit to loving an otherwise hard to love individual. 5) If we are quiet and otherwise disengaged, sound the alarm! If we are at a social event it means its time to go. Now. Something has occurred that has shut us down and has trumped the usual niceties of a cordial exit. So lets just get out of there. Dont try to find out what happened. Dont try to encourage our feelings to be more positive or prolong the engagement. This will only lead to a total meltdown. Get us home (or a relatively safe spot) and then we can chat. If were at home, dont assume its because of you. It might be; but dont assume. Talk to us. If we respond ok, then keep talking. If we try to pick a fight, just let it happen. Dont be mean and personal (unless we are) because we will never ever get over anything hurtful you say. Time will allow you to understand our moods and learn to respond to them accordingly. It will never be perfect because we just arent built that way. Just enjoy the trip as long as you can bear it; and when you part, do it on good terms. We will be your friend for life and you will miss us desperately! Make sure you leave things as such that you can make that midnight phone call to us to ease your ache.
Posted on: Thu, 17 Jul 2014 18:41:55 +0000
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