Fly on the wall. From a recent closed-door marketing meeting at Merck: Gentlepeople, we proudly present ShadowAway, to be called OmbraDisparus in France, our other test market - Lou, Ill talk to you after the meeting - a vaccine designed specifically for the most faint-hearted of the general public, who are in essence so completely bamboozled by our nonsensical and absurd characterizations of the diseases they think vaccines prevent as onerous and deadly, that they are now afraid of their own shadows. To aid in the campaign, weve devised a unique and refreshing strategy: a study weve completed, which has already been sent to Bobbi Jo and Kenny in the Peer Review Department for approval, found that bacteria and viruses thrive in the cool of shadows. Thus - we shall insist, so they shall believe, eh? - though the vaccinated are truly protected, the pathogenic agents are closer than wed thought, following behind in their temperature-friendly shadows. And we have the solution: ShadowAway. Theres a slight anomaly, in that you have to get a daily booster - but who better to line up to get them than the fools who believe every word we say? I mean, weve already got them convinced that its not only incredibly stupid, but beneficial!, to inject diseases, mercury, aluminum, formaldehyde, other known neurotoxins!, animal and vegetable proteins, unnecessary antibiotics, and Gawd knows what contaminants we ship out from time to time and batch to batch. The skys the limit. Sandys got a packet of promotional material for each of you. Some of you may have some questions about the vaccine. Dont ask them, if you want to remain a member of the Merck phamily. Thats it folks - Lou, a minute of your time...
Posted on: Sun, 09 Mar 2014 14:26:19 +0000