For your reading pleasure... a New Years Eve short... Take Me to Church Danielle Lee Zwissler I could feel my breath hitch in my chest, my heart race, and the tears as they came down my cheeks. I put my head in my hands and thought back to that day 22 years ago while I sat in the waiting room waiting to see my dad. I was 16, and it was the winter of 77’. I had just gotten my license, and I wanted to drive home from church. I will never forget what I had taken away in that one moment. I wish I could go back, take the keys from that eager boy’s hands, and whisper in his mother’s ear to not give in to her baby so easily. I wish… “Mr. Sanders, the Dr. will see you now,” an RN spoke softly. I followed her down the hall to Dad’s room. “Dad?” “Eric?” “Are you okay?” “It’s time, Eric.” “But I’m not ready yet.” “We both knew this time would come. I’m just sorry that I can’t be around to see you become a father. You’re going to be a great dad.” I shook my head. “It was because of me, all of those things,” I interrupted furiously. “No, no, son, it wasn’t. If it wasn’t for…well, if I wasn’t in this chair, I’d have been working all the time, and…well…” “I put you in that chair! I killed Mom!” “No!” Dad shouted. “You were a kid. We gave you the keys! If it didn’t happen then, it would have happened another time. She didn’t feel pain, Eric. It was instant. She was here, and then she wasn’t.” That day would live forever in my mind. “And, you, have you felt no pain?” “Pain is a state of mind. The only pain I’ve ever felt was losing your mom. I loved her, love… her very much.” “And I took her away from you.” “You gave me a second chance. The morning of the accident, your mother and I decided something. She didn’t like my working all the time, and I didn’t like having no money. I chose my job over family. We were going to get a divorce.” I gasped, hardly believing what my dad was saying. “When the accident happened, it changed my life. I would have given anything to save your mom. That chair was the best thing that happened to me. The best thing in my life, the most important thing… has always been you. Your mother knew it, and if there is a God, which your mother had always believed that there was, I think she got through to him. There are no accidents, Son. I believe that Fate had intervened, and as a result, I got to be the father that you needed. You, son, are to not grieve anymore.” “But you’ve lead an imprisoned life, stuck in that wheelchair.” “No, I’ve had an adventurous journey because of you. Raising you was enough.” “Please, don’t go, Dad,” I cried. “I don’t think we ever really leave, Eric.” Dad patted his heart and then looked at me. “I will be with you…always.” He closed his eyes one last time. “I love you, Dad.”
Posted on: Thu, 01 Jan 2015 04:34:05 +0000
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