Funny spam/scam email: FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION FBI. WASHINGTON DC. ANTI-TERRORIST AND MONETARY CRIMES DIVISION FBI HEADQUARTERS IN WASHINGTON, D.C. FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION [Do you get the feeling they want to be sure I know its the FBI?] This is the second Time we are sending this email [why is Time capitalized? Are you talking about the magazine or is your Time more important than my time?] from the Office of the Federal Bureau Of Investigation (FBI) [Theres that FBI thing again. They seem to have a rather tenuous grasp of the rules regarding capitalization. They got the of correct in the first part, but then capitalized it later in Federal Bureau Of Investigation. I dont suppose they want to know that if its capitalized, that would make it FBOI and not FBI.] as stated to you earlier, a conference meeting was hold [Mmm-hmm. Was hold, huh? English much? One would think that people who were genuinely employed by the FBI could handle simple grammar.] here in Washington on Friday January 2014 [No particular Friday in January, just one of those Fridays in there somewhere...] with the official members [They have unofficial members?] of the Nigeria Government including the Nigeria President Good Luck Jonathan. [Ha ha ha ha ha. Really? The dudes name is Good Luck Jonathan? Sounds like a banner parents put on the front porch when kids leave home!] The meeting also includes [Do you maybe mean included? Since it happened in the past? Theres that pesky grammar thing again.] the United Nations Organization Gen. bank Moon, [Hmm, methinks you have money on the mind. The dudes name is Ban Ki-moon not bank Moon. Heh. Maybe they thought it was Banky Moon. Theres another joke in there somewhere, but I dont think I want to go there.] U.S President Barrack Obama and members of the FBI organization. [Gee, everyone else had names but the poor FBI folk are nameless? Maybe theyre under cover (yeah, with banky moon)] At the meeting, the President of Nigeria Good luck Jonathan [Snort. He lost his capital L in Luck this time. Hes losing ground.] made the U.S Authority to know [Which U.S (no period after the S) Authority? THE US Authority, of course. I wonder who that might be. He made them to know? Now, saying it like that, it kinda sounds Biblical ...] that most country [Countries. Plural, dude, plural. Buy a vowel, theyre cheap.] including U.S has been scammed by most Nigeria imposers [Most countries have been scammed by most Nigeria (not Nigerian, mind you) imposers (not imposters). So ... Nigeria imposers drop in unannounced in some countries and scam people, right? No?] claiming to be from high governmental bodies (Banks and courier companies). [Gotta love those high bodies. They should lay off the pot, their spelling/grammar might improve.] The president of Nigeria also made the U.S Authority to know that the issue of scam has generated so much in the country [So Nigeria has made so much money off these scams that ... wait. What? I can barely even parse that. I think they were getting excited.] Nigeria by most corrupt bank, offices and courier companies and for that reason, the Nigeria government has appointed the Economic and Financial Crime Commission (EFCC) and the Nigeria Police to fight against the scam going on in the country Nigeria. In addition to that, the Nigeria Government has now budgeted the total sum of Nine Hundred Million United state dollars (US$900,000,000.00) to compensate every scam victim around the world [Was it *the* most corrupt bank, or are they talking about a bunch of corrupt banks. And the Nigeria -- one of the most destitute of places -- is buying their good Name (note the capital) back? Does Nigeria even have that much money? And if theyre compensating everyone around the world, well, 900 million isnt going very far. ] who has been scam by the Nigerian Imposers in order regain the good Name of the country Nigeria. [There are those rude imposer again.] Meanwhile this message is to let you know that the United State Authority has accepted the Budget from the Nigerian Government to compensate all scam victims and all the List of Individuals to receive a compensation sum of Three Million Five Hundred Thousand United state Dollars (US$3.5Million) each has been submitted to the office of the U.S President Barrack Obama in order to make sure that every scam victim receives his or her compensation Award from the Nigerian Government. [So theyre giving every scam victim whose been imposed upon by Nigeria 3 million 5 hundred. So ... that 900 million wont go too far indeed! If they used it all in the US (screw the rest of the world!) that would only cover 257 people. Im pretty sure there have been more than 257 patsies ... er ... victims in the US ...] Also the FBI Office in conjunction with the UN has been appointed by the U.S Authority to supervise every foreign transaction to avoid Money laundry and scam. [Snicker. To avoid money laundry and scam? Im picturing the local laundromat with a Money Laundry -- sanitized for your protection sign in the window] Your Name and information has been submitted to this office of the FBI by the Nigeria Government and you are among the list of individual to receive a compensation Award of US$3.5Million so base on this you are advice to stop every transaction you are having else where including Nigeria [The English got really bad here. They were really, really excited to get to the meat of this, werent they? So ... my name is on the list and Im supposed to stop *every transaction* everywhere? How will I buy lunch?! Ill starve!] Then they asked for all sorts of goodies like name, address, etc. As stated you are advice to stop every transaction you are having else where because the Nigeria EFCC and Interpol are now on investigation to see that they terminate all the Imposers [Whoa! Theyre terminating the imposers? Wow. Harsh.] so if we should find out you are still dealing with them, your Fund will be canceled and you will be arrested for Fraud. [Riiiiight.] Your urgent respond to this email is needed. (federalinvestigation1@outlook) [Ha ha ha ha ha. The FBI cant even afford its own email address? Times are tough, man, times are tough.]
Posted on: Thu, 02 Oct 2014 18:53:50 +0000
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