GET LOST AND GIVE ROSES……At one point or another in each of our lives we will experience pain(s) (John 16:33). Pain can fall on many different levels. Some pains are physical others are emotional. Then there are the other kind of pain(s), which are so deep, there are no words to describe them. Pains that are rooted in lies, deception and betrayal; this kind of pain comes to destroy your life (it is a post card from hell, DO NOT READ into it, James 4:7-8) . If you are not careful it can leave you a hollow shell just going through the motions of life with no real feeling in your body. For the past year this was the reality of the pain I found myself battling. The kind of pain that you cannot put into words. You find it hard to trust and relate to the rest of the world around you. You exist but don’t feel alive. This is when you have to surround yourself with the best of the best, to help you go through the unbearable. The best of the best does not get any better than my best friend JESUS. We are so close now, we are inseparable. I constantly have to do a “C.J.” check throughout the day. He is within me and he has also used others to help me get to where I am today. Everything is no longer gray. I can finally see colors and feel true emotions toward my fellow human, whether you like me, know me or not, “I LOVE YOU” (Why? “Just cuz”). But in order to enjoy this full peace and renewed joy I have in me, he had to use other people to coach, push and helping me to see that, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. So here is an, ACKNOWLEDGEMENT to all those who he has used…Beta Nagbe Siaway, I say “thank you for keeping my head from floating of my body (me and my crazy big ideas), Lord know that is a difficult job but you do it so well, thanks sis.” Dave Marth Nagbe….."you deserve the “cuzzo” of the year award. Your bubbly sense of humor and love for the sparkly things in life makes anyone with a sense of fashion want to be around you, I love you no matter what." To Regina Gartei……"Our friendship has gone through more tests then the, Emergency Alert System. Yet, somehow we find ourselves still hanging on. You are appreciated, love you sis." To Haley Thomas.... "You are a beautiful person inside and out. Thank you for the love you showered on Happi, while we were together. Each time she sees a pic of the two of you together she starts smiling and pointing (I think she likes that hat)." To Aubrey Burnette Mitchell Jr..... "I like to apologize for being such a horrible friend. I am not good with friendship, so I am praying that God will give you the heart to forgive me. Thank you for your powerful and anointed posts. You really do know how to lift a broken soul, with your essays and deep poetry." Last but definitely not the least, thanks to my “Happi Bean” it was through you in this moment of (sitting in the sand ) getting away from all the stress, noise and the never ending array of, “to do list” that I was able to gain a full understanding of all those who really matter to me. I have learned how I can build or (rebuild) a better and stronger relationship with each one. Most importantly, how I can be a better mother for you. It was in this moment of “getting lost”. I realize that the first step to accomplishing all the things on my “Green List” is to, FULLY accept the things I cannot change and to practice effective communication (something I am not very good at). No one can read your mind; you have to let people know how you feel. So, I appreciate and thank you ALL. If I forgot to list you and you find yourself reading all the way to the end of this essay,(and we are friends in one way or another,) know that you are appreciated too……STAY HAPPI :)
Posted on: Wed, 17 Jul 2013 17:16:35 +0000
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