Good morning FB. Im tired and drained...physically, mentally and emotionally. Ive tried hard to do the task that was set before me but sometimes its simply impossible to reach everyone, if anyone. You end up being hurt again and again when your intentions are truly well-meaning and innocent. Sometimes what we say may be covering up what we really are trying to say. Im scared, worried, nervous, concerned, helpless to help; if I could, Id trade places with you in a heartbeat. I prayed hard this morning asking God to take the task of kindness, caring and compassion and love away from me..to give me relief and peace of mind. To give me a hard heart rather than this soft, compassionate one. To let me be like everyone else. To judge, hate, envy, resent, angry, unforgiving, mean, bitter and hard-hearted. He told me that He would not give me those things; that I have free will to choose to be them if I wanted to but He would NOT bestow them on me because that is NOT who He is or what He is all about.. I told Him that it would not be of my free will to become like this, but the will of others who have surely begun the job for me. I know He is not pleased, but He acknowledges that even His beloved son came down to help and ended up being tortured and brutalized like an animal, his crown he gave up replaced with a crown of thorns, vinegar poured into his parched mouth and mocked and made fun of and talked about. That some people did not know a saint even when he showed them proof. I wish I had the patience to continue to be long-suffering like God has been but if continuing to be hurt, mocked, unjustly judged and criticized is what I have to do to receive my crown of gold , I dont think Ill be getting mine. I tried though which is more than I can say about many others. Peace to you all.
Posted on: Sun, 27 Oct 2013 16:00:43 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015