Got home, to papis really late from doing stuff he needed went to his room thinking Papi was still awake waiting for us, but he was passed out sleeping on his bed... So many feelings and thoughts comin out at that moment, seeing him so old and weak, felt so much compassion and love for him...missing mami too... thinking one generation is about to go, and so many things I wanted to know about it, so many questions that I long to ask mami, I will never know the answers to... papi is so full of knowledge and so eager to share it with us, his kids and his grandkids, he cant hardly hear or see, and his thoughts and concentration come and go, he gets frustrated because he knows he might run out of time to share with us his whole life, when he is gone so are all of those amazing experiences and wisdom we sometimes wish we had... I watched him sleep, I called him, hoping he wake up just to see his happy face when he realized he wasnt alone anymore....just to hear him talk , but he was sound asleep, wonder what his dreams are at almost 94 years old...I regret not spending more time with him after mami passed, those were really dark times for him, I regret fighting with him for stupid things, I regret so many things that made him cry, I would give everything I own to know his most inner thoughts about life, about us, his kids, and about the imminent death he awaits for every night...One generation about to dissapear from this Earth, I wish I knew everything about ....
Posted on: Thu, 26 Jun 2014 04:33:13 +0000
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