Gratitude alan dolit Sometimes it seems that my life is programmed and I’m just living a prepared script. Usually I’m not aware of it as it is happening, only in retrospect. And sometimes it seems the programmer even unobtrusively gets involved. For example when I was seven I was crossing a busy street with my mother. I must have been daydreaming, as when I stepped off the curb, a car made a right turn and would certainly have hit me had an arm not pulled me back to the side walk. Uncannily it wasn’t my mother, and yet there was no one else there. In fact it happened so quickly my mother hadn’t realized what had happened. She assumed I somehow jumped back by myself. Another situation happened many years ago when my daughters were very young. I was driving on Highway One in California going the speed limit, and one my daughters and her girlfriend were in the back seat. I was feeling sleepy and closed my eyes and momentarily forgot to open them. All of a sudden I heard a voice in my head that sounded like a truck driver. It shouted in a gruff voice “wake up mac”. I was startled awake just in time to avoid drifting into a barrier and getting everyone killed or severely maimed. I didn’t understand where the voice came from as there was no one else around and neither of the girls realized what had just occurred. There is a Zen story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbor came to visit. Such bad luck, he said sympathetically. May be so, may be not, the farmer replied. The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. How wonderful, the neighbor exclaimed. May be so, may be not replied the old man. The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbor again came to offer his sympathy on the son’s misfortune. May be so, may be not, answered the farmer. The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the sons leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbor congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out. may be so, may be not, said the farmer. I’ve had many things happen my life that seemed calamitous at the time, but turned out to be a good thing in the end. For example when I was 16 in 1951 the Korean war was on. I had seen a movie called Battleground about WW2 which to me glamorized and romanticized warfare. As a result I couldn’t wait to enlist, and I even conned my mother into signing the papers so I could enlist when I was 17. I was even able to take the number of credits needed to graduate six months early. So within a week after graduation I was on my way to Fort Dix, N. J. One week later I was transferred to Fort Leonard Wood, Mo. And three days later I realized my mistake. And after being in the army for only ten days, I understood why no one else enlisted. I was the only enlistee in the unit. All the others had been drafted. I was trying to think up an excuse to get discharged. I had an imaginary conversation with the commanding officer. The conversation went something like this: Sir, I have reviewed the reasons I enlisted in the army and realize Ive made a terrible mistake. I therefore request an honorable discharge effective immediately. Let me get this straight, private. Youve been in the army ten days, and was given an ample supply of clothing, a free hair cut and have eaten at least 30 meals, and now you are asking to be discharged two years, 11 months and 21 days early, is that what you are trying to tell me? Yes sir. Thats it exactly. You see that... “Quiet soldier. Have you ever gone fishing” “No sir” Well no matter. If you had gone fishing youd have baited a hook with a nice juicy worm. A fish would come along and see the worm and think wow. How interesting that a nice juicy worm is presenting itself for my dinner. Now the fish doesnt ask itself what is a worm doing in the middle of the stream. And it is certainly not aware of the irremovable hook that he’ll be swallowing. However, you are not a worm, even though while in basic training youll be called that many times. And you are intelligent enough to know that once the army hooks you, you cant unhook yourself. Anyone over the age of 12 would have enough smarts to know that. So I dont want to see you again for the next two years, eleven months and 21 days, and then if you havent screwed up by pulling some asshole stunt like this again, youll get your discharge. Now get your butt out of here on the double before you wind up in the brig. Yes sir. So I served my time and eventually got discharged and because of the G.I. Bill, was able to complete college, that I might not have had the opportunity to do otherwise. Also the experience gave me a whole new perspective of the world and human nature that I may never have had the opportunity to experience. After getting immersed with A Course in Miracles I have been able to put everything into perspective. I know everything in my life is there for a reason, even if it may feel like hell at the time. So there is nothing in my life that I’m not grateful for. I’m grateful I rarely if ever get caught up in other peoples’ melodramas. I’m grateful for sunshine, Margaret, good food and music, a sense of humor, and not having to work, and still live comfortably. Im grateful for good health, a nice head of hair, and being able to live in the most perfect climate. Im grateful I dont have to please anyone or live up to anyone’s expectations. I’m grateful for a life that works, so I don’t have to. I’m grateful I’ve given up holding on to grievances or carrying grudges. Im grateful there is no one I havent forgiven including myself, and that I accept responsibility for my behavior. Im grateful I don’t have to fix anyone or make them wrong, and I don’t play victim to other people, the world or God. Im grateful to know without a doubt there is a loving non punishing God Who Wills total and complete happiness for everyone without suffering, or sacrifice or having to earn His Love, and to know that there is absolutely nothing I or anyone else can do that would cause God to stop unconditionally loving us. I’m especially grateful to Jesus for giving the world “A Course in Miracles.” One of my favorite lines from the Course is “Love is the way I walk in gratitude” Im also grateful for the following quote attributed to mother Theresa: “People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies. Succeed anyway If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you. Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight. Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget by tomorrow Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough but give the world the best youve got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God: It never was between you and them anyway.” And Im grateful to Longchenpa a fourteenth-century Tibetan master for the following: “Since things neither exist nor dont exist, are neither real nor unreal, are utterly beyond adopting and rejecting - one might as well burst out laughing.” And to Malachy McCourt for this quote: Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.
Posted on: Thu, 07 Aug 2014 03:23:31 +0000
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