Group input needed: My ex is self employed and does not pay child support regularly. He is in arrears and stays there. He is ordered to pay half of medical bills for our four children plus carry medical insurance. We have joint custody with me being the parent who has the right to establish residence. Last summer he tried to ask for full custody of all four kids. The oldest testified in open court. The second oldest in judges chambers. Currently we are under temporary orders since august 2013, that ex has no visitation with the oldest three except in a therapeutic environment, and 1/3/5 weekends with youngest child. That made no sense to me that he was unsafe for the older three but completely fine for youngest and most vulnerable to visit now alone without sibling protection. Then in October 2013 after only 5 therapy sessions, the therapist said no more visits and cited the reason being irreparable relationship between father and children. He said it was just not healthy. Our children were scared to even be in the same room with their father. Ex had claimed parental alienation but therapist said the kids had made it clear in sessions that I did in fact encourage the relationship and according to the kids sometimes to the point of annoyance. He did not believe I had alienated and felt I was supporting and encouraging the relationship. Since October my ex has not asked to see the older three, he has not messaged them or attempted to see them or communicate with them at all. He continues visits with the youngest, who struggles with trying to understand why his siblings dont go to visitation but he still has to. He says he doesnt like going. He dreads the visits, asks when he can stop going or talk to the judge like his siblings did, etc. He comes home sick from visits frequently. He says his father doesnt talk to him when hes there and he spends the majority of visitation at exes moms house. Ex does not participate in school things for youngest and often sends others to pick our child up for him on his day. I have been sending all medial and dental bills to ex for over a year and he will respond saying he will not pay and he will not be a bank for me when he doesnt even get to see his kids. Im at a loss. I dont expect him to do the right Thing and pay his half, but Ive been advised I must follow the decree and submit receipts to him for reimbursement. If he chooses not to pay we will bring it to court (if we ever get a hearing set). Been in temp orders nine months now. Im just looking for advice. Suggestions? I have to pay these bills and meet the kids needs ALL the time while he gets to choose not to. I know time will kick him in the pants and the kids see who is meeting their needs. Just wondering if theres anything I can do to expedite the process or to help show the courts how my youngest is effected. Also, if I have a leg to stand on to get cs adjusted since three of four are with me 100% of the time and the youngest about 60%.
Posted on: Fri, 23 May 2014 05:44:06 +0000
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