Hi Im in the same situatio my partner and I have two children A boy 6 years and a girl four years old i worked while i was pregnant with both up until the week they were due I returned to work 12 months to the day of having my son we bonded in the 12 months I had of work and still bond today. my daughter and I did not bond in the 12 months I had of work I found she bonded with her dad a lot more then me I returned to work to see the bond become stronger between my daughter and her dad this was ok but I was not happy as i could not get the bond I have with my son I separated with my partner when she was 2 and a bit years old we had a very bad breakup as I found him in bed with our baby sitters sister after he denied anything was going on so that broke me I told him to leave that I didnt wont him to live with us I had lost all trust in him and the relationship this got messy I had to have an avo as he was harassing me threatening my life and telling me if I carny have you no one can so the last three years have been hell but I still let my children see there father I will not Deni that right my daughter and I fight all the time she is four now and I still do not have the bond I ask her if she loves me and often she says no I have dealt with a lot of pain and heart ache and I feel like I can not cope Im on anti depressants Valium sleeping tablets but I sit up all hours of the night as I am not happy with my life and need to learn how to live I find all I do is yell and scream at her and I hate myself for this I have even told her I will pack her bag and drop her if at the naughty girls home then I go to the toilet a cry my heart out as I just dont know what to do I dont know how to get the bond as her father has also told her that she doesnt have to love mummy tell her shes an idiot and a dumb ass I get this often from my daughter and when I smack her for saying it I think does she understand what she is saying it is hard we all have our days maybe you are like me love the work and the social life that we have then we go home to reality were we are depressed and can not function properly for our kids Id like to start a group for the kids on weekends were are you located might be able to work something out if interested and location I hope you understand that you are not alone many times I say to my daughter you can go live with youre dad Ive had enough I can not do this any more I can not yell at you any more but then I feel bad because if I lost any of my children I dont know how I would cope even thou I still do not have that bond and wonder will I ever or will she just hate me when she is older please dont feel alone as Im in the same boat xxx Belinda chin up I hope you sort things out as Im still trying xx** jo xx
Posted on: Tue, 15 Oct 2013 18:39:07 +0000
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