Hollywood’s Morning Report: It has been a day of pure laughter for me as I have been reminded through the day from about 10 different people of my MTI antics and things that I use to love doing so much. In the end it was always just pure luck that I would happen to be in the right spot at the right time even though I would always call it “Timing” Just good old fashion good timing. It was just 10 years of good luck really….Here are two of them: And so it was my first tour, I was at the 331st, 0 week and 6th week. Both were female flights. It was a Thursday. My 0 weekers were up in the dorm and they were supposed to be packing their washed civilian clothes that they just got back so we could put their luggage away. I was checking on my 6th weekers making sure they were all back from their base lib after retreat, drinking water so they would be hydrated for parade in the morning so they wouldn’t pass out. As I was briefing two of my 6th week females downstairs underneath the overhang by the 8 dorms (which are on the east side of the building and next to that side of the squadron is a big open field, then one of the base pools and then a gate to get on and off the base which were the dorms that the 0 week females were in) we noticed a female coming down the fire escape holding the hand rails, walking until she hit that grass and then BAM! She took off running! Well, ok, not REAAAAALLY running! She thought she was, but remember, this was a zero week female, soooooo, out of shape, chubby and more like a jog. As I looked at her I stopped talking and so the two I was talking to looked to see what I was looking at and my mouth opened up and I said, “Now where in the blue hell does that dork think she is going?” And then I started to chuckle at how she was “running”. The two Airmen that I was talking to both got a evil grin and said at the same time, “Sir, do you want us to go and get her?!” I thought, girl on the run, girls giving chase….Hell that is safer than guys going after her. “Yea, go get her and bring her ba” They were gone before I could finish what I was going to say! Them two were at a sprint! They were running so fast that dust was kickin up from their feet! I stood at the end of the squadron and watched. Like a pair of Raptors from Jurassic Park they split up, one on the left and one on the right, got their angle and both went in at the same time and tackled that trainee like a pair of hungry Outside Linebackers! All I could see was that trainee’s feet go up in the air, sticking out of that dust ball! They brought her back, she was crying for her Momma, saying she got on the wrong bus (I always told the special trainees that they got on the wrong bus and they need to find another bus to get back on it) She was a hot mess and ended up at the nut ward 4D. Just happened to be at the right place at the right time to see her try to “escape” from the Demon they called SSgt Rogers! Second tour and back at the 331st again. Now a Section Sup for Section 2 and I did pick up for one of my instructors. Picking up across the hall was Sgt Yi. My man! The flight he was picking up came in after mine. Mine were already in bed and I was at the computer doing their paperwork and I could hear Sgt Yi going off on some kid telling him to “Shut up! Shut up! Get your ass back in that bed and shut the hell up!” So I got up to go see what was going on. As I’m walking across the hall to see what the hell is going on Sgt Yi informs this kid that he does NOT want the Devil to come into that dorm and put him in his bed. (right place at the right time) Just as he is finishing up telling this kid that I walk into the dorm and I am now standing behind the trainee and he does not know it yet. Sgt Yi starts telling him, “Awwww hell! Now you’ve done it! Now you have caused the Devil to come up into the dormitory! You’ve done messed up now! I tried to tell you!” This trainee is about 5’8 and I’m 6’0. He turns around and I am RIGHT behind him at this point so he is looking at my chest. He slowly looks up at me and I give him my “Look”. I thought for sure he was going to pass out cause his eyes rolled back into his head. He was a black young man but I’m pretty sure (could have been the lighting…not sure) but he turned chalk white and then he crapped his pants! Yi is behind him and he is dying laughing in silence, I’m asking the kid what the problem seems to be, he can’t get any words out of his mouth and I tell him in a very low whisper like I’m a psycho path, “If you do NOT get your ass in your bed in the next couple of seconds your parents are going to have to request a closed casket” Well he went to bed but he too went to the nut floor 4D the next day. I leave you today with this: There was a time when training was not making kids fill their canteens with toilet water, Instructors were not abusing their power and sleeping with the nasty gross enemy, we didn’t have MTI tools…..but instead we TRAINED HARD AND FAIR so that our military replacements had and would hold a standard that we placed in front of them to meet! Sure we used cuss words every now and then but it was nothing like the music, movies or tv shows they watch today. We worked long hard days/weeks/months, we had comrade like no other, we corrected each other and didn’t get butt hurt when someone did, we BBQ’d at the confidence course, took over the E-Club on Friday’s, randomly made students teach even when they were not our students (not to belittle them but to give honest feedback to make them better so we would have a stronger core) and we just had fun! I pray that one day we get back to that. The trainees should leave BMT with as many funny stories about their time as their MTI does, because the worse time of their lives should also be the best time of their career that they will remember and laugh about when they are Grandparents. MUCH LUV PEOPLE! Enjoy your Throw Back Thursday! NOW DANCE!
Posted on: Thu, 25 Sep 2014 07:01:59 +0000
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