How you can help a suicidal person Sometimes when a person is feeling suicidal they will reach out and tell someone. It is usually someone they feel could help them, or listen to them. It may be that they have already started their suicide attempt, or it may be before they try. They may be crying and sobbing or they may be subdued and quiet, no two people react the same way. If you suspect someone is thinking of suicide or is showing signs that they may be don’t hesitate, ask them outright. Asking a person who is suicidal if they are having suicidal thoughts and feelings gives them permission to feel that way, thus reducing their isolation and desperation. It shows that someone else is aware and understands just how desperate they are feeling. A person who is feeling isolated is more likely to go ahead with a suicide attempt. Asking someone if they are suicidal can be difficult. I have a few suggestions to make it easier: •Are you feeling so bad that you’re considering suicide? •That sounds like an awful lot for one person to take; has it made you think about killing yourself to escape? •Has all that pain you’re going through made you think about hurting yourself? •Have you ever felt like just throwing it all away? Listen carefully to their response. Sometimes they may initially say i don’t know or no when they really mean yes. Usually if they say no and mean no they will talk about a specific reason they have to live for. It may be helpful to ask them if they were ever in a position of feeling suicidal how would they plan to kill themselves. This could be useful information for future reference. It may in fact be that they do feel suicidal but they don’t feel comfortable telling you outright. It may seem like a crazy idea, talking about suicide and ways of killing yourself to a person who you suspect may be indeed suicidal. But it can give you vital clues and information to help them survive. If someone is hell bent on suicide they will most probably do it anyway. It must always remain the person’s own responsibility to choose what they wish to do. However, by talking to someone and helping people to deal with their problems better, to see their options more clearly, to make better choices for themselves and avoid choices that they would normally regret empowers people with their rights; it does not take their rights away. When someone tells you they are having suicidal thoughts and feelings it is imperative that you listen. Encourage them to talk about their feelings. They need to know how you feel about it. Tell them outright that you don’t want them to die. Try to make yourself available for them. Take them seriously. Try to extract a promise from them that when they feel suicidal they will contact you or someone that can help, like a counsellor, or a doctor, before they do anything. If they refuse to talk and appear determined, they may need to go directly to hospital. Talking may seem like it is not doing much to help, but by asking them about their thoughts and getting them to talk about how they are feeling reduces their feelings of isolation and distress and so reduces the immediate risk of suicide. Getting them to talk is a short term strategy. It is important that professionals who know how to help resolve the problems are notified. People who have attempted suicide previously are more likely to attempt suicide again. Counselling can’t cure problems, but it is a way of finding ways to cope and maybe finding ways of resolving some of the issues that may be contributing to a persons suicidal tendencies. It is important that you don’t try and deal with the situation totally on your own. The best way of helping is to refer them to someone who is equipped to offer them the help they need, while you continue to support them. If you don’t know where to turn there are 24 Hour anonymous telephone counselling or suicide services in your area that you can call. They will be listed in your local telephone directory.
Posted on: Mon, 02 Dec 2013 05:49:59 +0000
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