I cried. I cried at 1:00 yesterday afternoon. I felt the aches of the ancestors; the fear of my sisters generation. I tried to eat, tried to sit with my scholars and segment words. 4:00- nothing. I drove to the safest place I knew- home. I needed my mother and fathers touch for la bendicion. I needed to be with my sisters. 7:00- nothing. I was sick. I cried during the verdict as I picked up the phone to hear Priscillas voice crack. We cried together until our tears where translated into spoken prayer. I sat all night in the same spot and watched as the city of Ferguson went down in flames; thinking of all my organizer friends holding blow horns leading the masses. I forced myself to go to sleep to wake with no words to write. Today I was quite. Today I listened. Today I hugged. Today I cried. Today I acknowledged. Today I prayed. Today I was present. Today I read countless statues of pain, anger, opinion, rage, fear, frustration, confusion, avoidance, encouragement, inspiration, hope, faith, and love. Today I shared with my brother Les Izmore, I cant sleep or eat but Im clear about the road ahead. I shared with my sister Natasha Ria El-Scari, I just need to cry for my people, our people. She responded, Yes sis, I need to as well I just dont know what to do... This evening I am grateful to belong to such an incredible community of artists, musicians, writers, actors, organizers, and educators. I am so proud to find among all the pain voices of friends Ive called allies for over 15 years- Anytown. Your resilient spirits to continue trusting the process, making waves, dialoguing, listening, remaining change agents breathes life onto my blank sheet of paper. This evening I write. This evening I will practice my right to assemble holding my 14 year old sisters hand. This evening I will cry again. This evening I will be an ally. This evening Im listening to Gods voice. There is work to do and I am making sure I do my work to do his work. Ancestors, walk with me.
Posted on: Wed, 26 Nov 2014 02:07:38 +0000
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