I decided to share some thoughts that have been running through my mind this week. About 3 months ago we created this group because many of you asked us to share our story of loss, of grief, of hope, and mostly share with everyone a our sons life. Our grief is as Eriks battle was - so very complex. As life goes back to normal for everyone, our lives are forever changed. There is not a morning that I dont wake up and expect to hear him getting his coffee. I long for the day to see him do that crazy dance move that made Chloe laugh until she cried. I am pretty sure that I will be the sad one at every happy event. I want to click my Ruby slippers and wake up from this awful dream. I miss him more than ever. Today marks 15 weeks since the Thursday that Erik died. On Tuesday I learned of the tragic loss of Robin Williams. I have wept that another person and family has lost the battle to this damn illness. I am so very sad that he suffered. I also desperately long for people who know nothing about this pain to take sometime to learn. To sit and listen rather than to be an authority on something they know absolutely nothing about. I read Robins daughters statement and thought it worth quoting. “My family has always been private about our time spent together. It was our way of keeping one thing that was ours, with a man we shared with an entire world. But now that’s gone, and I feel stripped bare. My last day with him was his birthday, and I will be forever grateful that my brothers and I got to spend that time alone with him, sharing gifts and laughter. He was always warm, even in his darkest moments. While I’ll never, ever understand how he could be loved so deeply and not find it in his heart to stay, there’s minor comfort in knowing our grief and loss, in some small way, is shared with millions. It doesn’t help the pain, but at least it’s a burden countless others now know we carry, and so many have offered to help lighten the load. Thank you for that. To those he touched who are sending kind words, know that one of his favorite things in the world was to make you all laugh. As for those who are sending negativity, know that some small, giggling part of him is sending a flock of pigeons to your house to poop on your car. Right after you’ve had it washed. After all, he loved to laugh too… Dad was, is and always will be one of the kindest, most generous, gentlest souls I’ve ever known, and while there are few things I know for certain right now, one of them is that not just my world, but the entire world is forever a little darker, less colorful and less full of laughter in his absence. We’ll just have to work twice as hard to fill it back up again.” Zelda made me laugh and cry. I actually admire her strength to call out those who are just hurtful. We are so blessed to be surrounded by many to ask us what it feels like to hear the news and see the posts this week. Thought this piece of Eriks artwork would be timely this week. It is called Homesick. Stay present in peoples lives....
Posted on: Thu, 14 Aug 2014 22:44:17 +0000
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