I thought I would be able to go without saying anything today, but as sure I woke up the words were on my heart. So here I am….. I remember talking to an atheist about God. It was a very intense conversation. He was set on getting me say there was no God. I don’t subscribe to any one set of thoughts on who God is. God is different for everyone. I do however know that for me there is a God. He said to me: How can you be so sure there is a God?” I told him…. On April 1, 2008 my mom passed. I didn’t think I was going to be able to move on. I didn’t think I would make it. I was in so much pain that it was swallowing me, it had taken over me. I told him there is no reason I am still sitting here talking to you and in my right mind other than the fact that there is a God who cares for me in ways I didn’t care for myself at times. There is a God who placed people in my life to not only help me get through that time, but who taught me how to thrive and use my pain as strength. This same God reminds me daily that I am stronger than any pain I will ever feel. While losing my mom was the most difficult thing I had yet to experience it prepared me for what was down the road. While I have learned to breathe again there isn’t a day that she doesn’t cross my mind. The number of times I wanted to grab my phone and say….. Mom I have a question…. Mom I love you …. Mom I appreciate you…. Mom what should I do…. Mom I’m scared…. I cant and from time to time that troubles me. I do know, however, that she watches over me. I feel her hand in my life. The many real life lessons that play out for me daily that she taught me. The love and encouragement that she showered on me that continues to power me. When I broke this down for him, I knew I hadn’t changed his mind, but his silence let me know that he was going to let me have this one. He understood that this was real for me. Ive been taken to the edge of lifes cliff and didn’t jump, because as sure as the sun and moon rise the love of God has protected me, comforted me and brought me through time and time again. Wendy Elaine you are missed. I love you dearly. Rest well. -Cande
Posted on: Tue, 01 Apr 2014 13:39:29 +0000
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