I try to compliment someone in person every time I go out. I dont know why I do it. Maybe the look on their face shows that they need some compassion. I received this Positive Thought in my email today and thought it was appropriate for today! Loving (an excerpt) Leo Buscaglia Posted: 09 Aug 2014 04:00 AM PDT Were made, mostly, by the people who surround us. We make each other every day. Im constantly telling this to people. They say, Oh, loving is so difficult. I say, Dont you know how easy it is? Loving is simple. Its we who are complex. Loving means offering the hassled waitress a Thank you. That was great. I ate recently at a real greasy spoon in Arizona. It was one of those places that you walk in and the odor is enough. Even the rats have deserted. But the food was really good. I had ordered pork chops, and somebody said, Youre crazy. Youre gonna die! Nobody eats pork chops in a place like this. I said, But they smell so good! And someone down at the end was having them, and he had an enormous dish! These pork chops were huge! And so I ordered the pork chops, and they were magnificent. After it was over, I said to the waitress, You know, Id really like to meet the chef. And she said, Was there something wrong? I said, No, I want to tell this guy how beautiful it was. She said, Oh, my God. No ones ever done that. And we walked back, and he was back there sweating. He was a big man. And he said, Whatsa matter? I said, Nothing. Those pork chops were just fantastic and those potatoes! They were really wonderful. Ive eaten at some of the best restaurants in the world, and they were as good. He looked at me like, God, this mans out of his mind. And then do you know what he said, (because it was so awkward for him to receive a compliment)--he said, Would you like another? Isnt that beautiful? Thats love. Thats all it means. It means sharing joy with people. When you see something beautiful, it means going over and telling them. When you see something lovely, say to them, Youre lovely. And then back away! Because its going to scare the hell out of them. One of the funniest experiences Ive ever had--maybe Ive even told this to some of you--but it occurs to me now and its such a beautiful kind of example. I saw this lovely girl on campus. She had golden hair and it was billowing in the sun. It looked so special. I passed her by and it flashed on me: What beautiful hair that girl has. And then as I walked by I thought, I should tell her. So I spun around and I charged back toward her. And she could sort of feel me, you know how you can do. She turned around like AAAACK! And I said, Dont be scared. All I want to do is tell you that you have the most beautiful hair with the sun on it, its a real trip. I just really liked it. Thank you very much. And then I moved away, because I know about the psychological premise of approach-avoidance. You know, the further you get from the feared object? So I moved slowly away, and as I got further and further away, it began to dawn on her that someone had paid her a compliment. And she started to smile. And by the time I got to the university entrance, she even waved and said, Thank you. It seemed to me that as she walked away, she stood ever taller, bringing her closer to the sun. Whats so difficult about that? We have these opportunities every single day of our lives, and we dont take them. We start with those people around us. We teach them self-respect and we make sure that everybody leaves with their beautiful compliment that day. People say, Oh, but Buscaglia, thats artificial. It doesnt have to be artificial when you really see it. Dont tell me the people around you dont deserve an occasional compliment. Whats artificial about that? . . . . And it never hurts anybody to be told that they are loved, to say to somebody, I love you. People say--especially this is true of men--Oh, she knows I love her. I dont have to tell her I love her. Oh really? When shes gone, then maybe youll wonder why. Its a simple thing to say, I love you. And if you cant say it, write it. If you cant write it, dance it. But say it! And say it many times. One never tires of it. One may say, Oh, never mind telling me that. I know . . . But its so nice to hear.
Posted on: Sat, 09 Aug 2014 15:47:59 +0000