I want to take a moment to apologize to my friends. I should not have been too proud to ask you for help. You arent just friends to me, youre my family....the only family I have in TN since my brother-in-law died last month. I did you all a disservice, as well as myself by taking on more than I could handle and not asking for a little assistance. With that said, I am so grateful to Connie and her family for caring about mine. They showed up today with a wonderful pasta and meatball casserole that Emily said was the best meatballs ever! She had three helpings today. They also dropped off cereal, milk, cookies and other treats for the girls and they are now having a new years eve snack party while waiting for the ball to drop. Im ashamed to admit with all thats going on I didnt even remember New years Eve for them, and it would have been a real disappointment without the treats and popcorn that was given today. Connie also loaned me a seated walker and shower seat that have been so helpful with my recovery. Marie and Jamie have also fed my family and I am sorry that I didnt ask for help sooner...before I damaged myself. The in-home health nurse had to cancel my therapy this week due to my screwup. The doctors team is pretty sure I caused damage to my newly inserted hardware, which will likely lead to a second surgery before the end of next year. This was the most painful surgery Ive had in my life (and Ive had 10 surgeries now) so I just cry at the thought of doing it again....all because I couldnt turn to one of you and say please help me. I didnt want to be a bother to anyone, and I was too da** proud to ask. It was selfish and Im sorry. Thank you all for being there for me, even when I dont know how to ask. Thank you for caring for my family when I cant. This past month has been overwhelming. We buried my brother-in-law, my husband unexpectedly lost his senior management job of 15 years and is slowly slipping toward depression at the realization that he may not find work at age 60 (he thought he had a job last week and it fell apart at the last minute). Add to that my back surgery and now injury of said fusion. Our expenses total just at $4,000 each month (thats including gas and food and prescriptions). Weve cut our phone to the basic, cut down our cable and internet and did away with any frivolous expenses and have been living off our savings, which we can expect to get us through for about another two more months before we cant pay our bills, so thats another major stressor. Emilys been sick for 10 days and I have no insurance for her, so thats another worry Im battling. I did apply online for TennCare today, something I never expected to have to do...but again Im learning I cant be too proud to ask for help. I guess I may have to apply for foodstamps in a couple months if Jim still hasnt found work, or if his unemployment still hasnt started. I summary, I just want to thank you for being there for me...for letting me vent when I need it...for giving me advice when I ask for it, and even when I dont...for trying to help in any way you can...and for keeping us in prayer, because prayer is the most treasured gift and greatest help you can give us right now. I love you all and could not imagine my life without each and everyone one of you. Its why Jimmy has not been looking for work father away than 90 miles. But if it comes to it, hes willing to live out of state and work all week, then come home on weekends just so we can stay here with our friends, church and Christian groups. He knows thats how much you mean to us.
Posted on: Thu, 01 Jan 2015 04:08:01 +0000
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