I wanted to update you all. What a crazy day! My mom has been in constant pain and discomfort lately,but has been plodding on and keeping her eyes focused on Christ. While I was having my back porch devotions with God,my sweet friend,Connie ,messaged to say that The Lord had laid me and my mom on her heart all night and she wanted to know if we wanted to set aside the day for prayer and fasting until 5:00. I am always up for prayer and fasting and since my mom has a chemo scheduled tomorrow-it seemed like a good time to do it. I also was praying for a friend who was in the hospital and a couple others that are going through their own harrowing cancer journeys themselves. The back porch was glorious. Its like a different world up there under that tree surrounded by herbs and flowers and serenaded by a bunch of brightly colored birds,bees,and butterflies. There was this sweet breeze that made it very pleasant,and my time was filled with verse after verse,passage after passage of trusting God and taking Him at His Word. As the day went on,my mom was ok,until right about 5:00,when the pain got excruciatingly bad-worse than it has been up to this point. It was at that moment that all I could do was cry out to God,weep,and ask you all for help in praying for her relief. When I say that I was crying out to God-I was shoulders shaking,nose running,dams bursting crying out to the One who knows all about my broken heart and my moms pain. I couldnt come up with anything more than,Jesus.Jesus.Jesus. Over and over again. I knew it was ok,though,because the Bible tells us that the Holy Spirit prays for us when there are no words left to say. The Lord always gives me a bit to cry it all out and then He always comforts me by giving me a song in my heart. The consolation began with Rock of Ages and There is Something about that Name,and before I knew it,I was singing a whole medley of old hymns that praise Him for who He is and how He loves us. Honestly,His faithfulness knows no end. I was sitting and singing and looking out over the back yard and the little yellow gold finches who were busy eating their thistle seed,when I realized that I was covered in absolute,unshakeable peace. A peace that truly passes all understanding. I have felt this heavy hand or blanket of peace throughout this whole thing with my mom. Like a little bird held tightly in the palm of the Masters hand. And when you give into the peace-the joy comes flooding in. Real joy. Like the moment your brand new little baby takes it first breath and cracks open its eyes kind of joy. Birthed right out of shaking shoulders,a soggy face,and a heart that feels like it can only break so many times before it is done for. It is a holy,God breathed,suffering-birthed joy that no one can ever take from you. It is amazing. As the spirits were rising and the dust was settling,the phone rang and another dear friend, Shelly ,called to tell me about her little girls vision. The Frio family was praying together for my mom. Shelly did not tell the kids what was wrong with her but that she was in pain. Towards the end of the prayer,Antonia said that she saw a video. Shelly had no idea what she was talking about,and so little Antonia explained. She saw Jesus and my mom. He reached out His gold hands and touched her belly and took the pain away and she was healed. How awesome is that? Out of the mouths of babes! Come unto Him as little children... Anyway- I called my sister to ask how my mom was feeling and she said that a few minutes before I called,the pain just stopped. My mom knew that Jesus had taken her pain away,and then I told her about Antonias video. I am here to tell you that my God is real. He is powerful and kind. He cares for the little birds-the little children -little me and you. He never promises us a life without pain or heart ache. Those things exist because this world is not our home. And yet He has overcome this world. He understands our sorrows. He has taken our burdens and heals our diseases. He is the same yesterday,today and forever, and He is with us. He does not forsake us. He is faithful. He is kind. He is true. He speaks to us through scripture,through songs,goldfinches on the bird feeder and sweet little girls who pray with total faith because they know He can fix things. I am stilled by His love. I am shackled to His mercy. I am set free by His grace. Our time here is so tiny. Like a little grain of sand or an itty bitty light in a huge sky full of stars. We are given choices in this little time frame of a life of joy,hope,love and salvation. Our hearts may still break. The rain may still fall,and life may not be fair. But when you choose this God. When you allow Him to woo you and love you and make you His-your tiny little light of life seems to brighten even the darkest of nights and the river of life begins to flow out of you and be nourishment and reprieve for all who are thirsty. I see why I was born. I understand my purpose. It is to be bowled over each and every day by the mercy of God and in turn,shine as brightly as I can with His glory to welcome more brothers and sisters home. There is a home with our name on it. There is a victory at the end of our story. There is a Someone standing on the porch waiting and watching for just a glimpse of us coming up the road. And when He sees us. He runs. Our God runs towards us. Arms flailing.kisses smothering. Rings on fingers and sandals on toes. That is Him in a nutshell. Mercy and Grace-ours for the taking. Peace and joy-ours for the keeping. Love and forgiveness-ours for the giving. My sweet sweet God. Backporch. Song on my heart. Videos and gold hands. And relief and rest for my beautiful mom. This is love. This is God. What are you waiting for? Thank you all for the prayers. Keep praying. Tomorrow is a biggie. But my God is bigger still.
Posted on: Thu, 03 Jul 2014 02:07:05 +0000
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