Ill be honest, the past 3 years Ive been wanting to quit swimming. Im not strong as I was when I was 12 years old and it kills me. Ill sob my eyes out once a week and throw all of my medals, trophies, and ribbons around because Im so disappointed in myself. I used to feel famous, Id have random people at swim meets point at me whispering You guys look!! Thats her! Anna Lundgren! And it made me feel great to have people come up to me and talk to me like I was somebody huge. It kept me motivated. But then my life got horrible, and I got depressed, anorexia, and I just wanted to die. So I gave up my #1 thing in my life. And everybody quit talking to me, nobody looked at me, people will tell me Im slow, and I dont think anybody realizes that this hurts more than being called ugly or something.. But then I got motivated recently, Ive been going to the gym again, dryland, swimming everyday I possibly can, eating healthy, just everything I need. And today is the day Ive found my strength in the water, and how I remember what its like to race. I pushed myself so hard tonight, the last 25 yards of the whole day I cried. I was just so happy because I made every interval like I used to 3 years ago. And to all of you stupid idiots who call me slow, screw yall. Because I swear, Short Course Southeasterns 2015, Anna Lundgren will blow all of yall away.
Posted on: Wed, 01 Oct 2014 00:18:02 +0000
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