Im alone....ish (were never really alone with access to facebook are we?), here in an RV parked outside the Bliss Jungle, soaking up some nourishing vibrations of solitude, giving context and contrast to feed my appreciation for what I have with Amma. It was getting to a place that no matter how much I practiced writing and remembering how awesome this relationship is, I was getting numb. The words were getting empty. And certain conversations were extra prickly. It was just time for a break, a change, a different perspective on me, her and us. Its hard because I dont want to have to take space. I want to be able to take space while still being, working and playing together. I just start to take everything for granted. I know Im lucky. I say it all the time. I write it in my gratitude journal. I list reasons. But to truly FEEL how lucky... how blessed, I am, I need to touch the other side; the potential for NOT having it, for losing it. And really, contemplate the inevitability that this will not exist one day. It is temporary. And whoa. How precious it becomes. After a few days apart and a well timed movie I am feeling this deeply. Bucket List (with Jack Nicholson & Morgan Freeman) is about two older men who get cancer and go on an adventure to complete there bucket list. Naturally it inspires the viewer to contemplate death and touch into the value of life and all the things that make it so beautiful. One thing I felt so deeply grateful for is that I have, at 32, crossed off one of the most incredible things I think anyone could have on their bucket list. - To know, feel, live and breathe True Love (the romantic gushy kind) I also want people to know that it exists and they can have it if they want it. I want to share our love, to tell the truth of our love, to transform ourselves and the world with our love. So I need to transmute EVERYTHING THAT IS NOT LOVE. ouch. breathe allow accept. ok. we can do this. Whats on your bucket list?
Posted on: Thu, 24 Jul 2014 09:17:53 +0000
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