Important issue which always comes up: How obliged are we to wake up our kids for Fajr (those of the age the Prophet ((صلى الله عليه وسلم) told us to command). Shaykh Shinqeeti was asked this and heres his beautiful answer for those know Arabic, and I will post an English translation below. مهم! إيقاظ الأبناء لصلاة الفجر لشيخنا الشنقيطي: youtu.be/Y7ViYEKmWts The translation is long but very important principles for us parents to know. 🔸A questioner asks: Some parents complain of finding difficulty waking their children up for Fajr, especially on holidays. So is the parent sinful if he tries and exerts effort in this, but to no avail? 🔹Shaykh Shinqeeti anwered: The father (parent) should exert effort but he must know that he is not excused in this regard. It is merely a matter of carelessness, falling short (in his duties), and laziness. You child is under your authority and control, so you must get him accustomed to your awakening him for salah from when he is young. Hence, you will find that the parent who does indeed make his children pray has in fact raised them from their young years on hearing (Allah’s commands) and obeying. You must destroy all obstacles coming between you and the obligations which Allah has commanded you with. Do not be afraid (to do this), for this is the source of salvation for you and your family. Some scholars said, “If every parent awakening their child for salah imagines that a snake is next to him or a fire is about to devour him, he would then know how to awaken his child for salah.” Make yourself feel that a fire is about to burn your child, and see, will you be able to wake him up or not?! He would, in such a case, exert everything in his means to wake him up. But when it comes to Allah’s religious commands, he looks for any excuse or fatwa he can find that will excuse him to leave Allah’s command. No, by Allah, you are not excused! Allah said, “Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones.” Save your child from the Hellfire. Allah said command him (to pray), so command him. Tell him, “Get up and pray.” Even if he is sleeping, lift him up (physically). The first time, he will see you as strong and hard (on him), and the next time it will be easier. This is how the battle is between truth and falsehood. But on the other hand, if you come on the first day and say with strength “My son, wake up to pray.” And he doesn’t respond to you (and you back off), so the Shaytan’s control will increase on him. Then the second day, you will say, “My son, wake up to pray” but weaker than the previous day. Then on the third day, you will wipe on his head and beg, “May Allah rectify you, my dear son, please wake up to pray.” And he will continue to get weaker and weaker until the Shaytan controls him, thus destroying him and his children together. He will be destroyed because he abandoned Allah’s command and his children will be destroyed by laziness and feebleness. Order them to do what Allah has ordered. Take them away from Allah’s fire! Imagine that your child is between Jannah and Hell and that he has no salvation except by commanding him to do what Allah has commanded. If you had this sense of responsibility, you would surely know how to awaken your child to pray. If your child has (to study for) an exam or any matter of the dunya to fulfill, you will know well how to wake him up and you will not care at all what happens as a result. But, how lightly the people take the matter’s of the deen now! How lightly the creation takes the Creator! “And they did not appraise Allah with His rightful appraisal.” May He be Exalted, the One who feeds them, clothes them, and provides for them! You will easily find any one of them waking his son up for the sake of an exam, and never will you hear him complaining about this! Have you ever heard anyone asking about how to wake his son up for exams? Do you ever hear anyone complaining about being unable to wake up their family members for their work shifts or any other matter of the dunya? Never, by Allah! If his son worked with him in his business, the whole house would get up with him! While you may even find some mothers telling the father, when he wants to awaken the child, “No, he’s tired, leave him. Don’t make things so difficult / harsh on him!” By Allah, true harshness, difficulty, and loss of the deen, dunya, and Hereafter is in falling short of Allah’s commandments. Twenty years ago, when supposed “civilization” entered upon them, they used to think that commanding others to obey Allah is harsh and backwards. Then, when they became careless and weak in raising their children, the child grew up speaking to his father as if he is a fool and speaking ill of his mother in her face, may Allah protect us! He could care less about any of Allah’s prohibitions or any rights of relations and kin on him! At that point, the parents bite their fingers from regret and how they then wish that they would have been (supposedly) “harsh and backward”, if it meant their children would be on a right path. True backwardness is to leave everyone to do what he wills, and that a father leaves and enters, never caring whether his child prayed or not! Fear Allah and order them with Allah’s commands; pull them away from the Fire! And Allah will help you and will direct you; He will never disappoint you. How many parents struggled to save their family and children from the Fire, so Allah granted them tawfeeq (success in that). And you will continue to have special help and victory from Allah with you at all times. From this moment, get yourself used to taking charge (of their religious affairs). Even if your son is older and refused to get up to pray, then don’t befriend him or talk to him, stand strong before him and denounce what he is doing, until he feels that he has no place in the home unless he establishes Allah’s deen and commandments. If the Muslims’ homes were on this straight path, all their deen and dunya affairs would be rectified and straightened. Umar ibn al-Khattab said, “We are a people whom Allah has dignified and honored with Islam. So whenever we seek dignity and honor in other than Islam, Allah will humiliate us.” So you will find the weakest and most humiliated parents in their homes are those unable to command with Allah’s commands and prohibit what He prohibits. And the most honored fathers and mothers in their homes are those in which they are in authority; but they are in authority and control when it comes to establishing Allah’s deen. For, truly, Allah promised (in the Qur’an) to firmly establish the authority of those who command with salah and zakah. Then after that, Allah will elevate your status, and you will be one who commands to good among your relatives, then among your community, and so on, until you become a rightly-guided guide to others- with Allah’s tawfeeq and guidance to what is correct. And Allah knows best.
Posted on: Sat, 20 Dec 2014 09:59:55 +0000
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