It can be so difficult when someone we are in relationship with, realizes that they need to separate in order to find themselves. This is not to be taken personally. Some can clarify who they are while in the heart of relationship, but not everyone can. Some really do need to separate in order to find their individual identity. They need the space to explore, to clarify, to integrate their realizations. So long as it is not an avoidant flight from intimacy, this can be a very positive decision- individuation is an essential step on the road to a sustainable relationship. If they are not at peace with their individual path, they will not be healthy, attuned partners. At the same time, one should not put their life on hold waiting for them. The fact is that they may never return, and, even if they do, you have no way of knowing who they will be. You fell in love with who they were at a moment in time, but that moment has passed. They are seeking a new identity now. Extend that offering to yourself as well. Move on from them and see where the river takes you, too. Sometimes there is a far more gratifying reality waiting right around the next bend.
Posted on: Sun, 26 Oct 2014 20:50:26 +0000
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