It has been a few days now since the passing of Robin Williams. Some of the folks out there are wondering what depression really is. Larry King tried to describe it. Though it is descent, their is a better way in explaining it. Putting everything aside for a second, we all know the basic emotions which the human can express. Joy, sadness, anger, etc. Now for some of us (like myself) their is a black hole that seeps within those emotions that tries to draw us inside to the endless darkness which is the baggage that comes with depression. Those of us who fight it on a day to day basis try to fill that hole and seal it off with other things. However, those things we try to fill that hole with end up getting swallowed over time by the black hole, only for us refill it again. Its a continuous cycle that we deal with on a day to day basis. Some cases (like with Robin Williams) that black hole ends up growing in size. Thus the joys which normally help seal that hole arent enough to keep it contained even if its for a short period of time. That baggage is the burdens each of us carry on a day to day basis. Which would bring about the next question. Why? Why not turn to others? The answer is fear. We fear that if we ask for help it be twisted in some way. Many would think we are seeking attention, and using depression as an excuse for it. Many of us feel that even if we try to reach out, we would be denied the aid we seek from the ones we trust, and love. I for one do feel this way on a day to day basis. The fight never ends for me. I do what I can to keep it sealed even if its for a while. When my emotions kick into high gear, I find a means to deal with it. Normally its sleeping it off. I never say anything about it, nor do I talk about it much. Its no fun either. But knowing for a fact that Im still here is a blessing in itself. Knowing for a fact I have people whom are close to me for support adds to it. Im no longer on medication for it. Medication just numbs it, doesnt help it. All I can do is deal with it. So far it hasnt conquered me yet. What I can say is thank you, robin for the laughs. Every joke, performance, stunt you have done in your career has helped lighten my burdens and allow my smile (as ugly as I think it is) to brighten my day. God bless you, and your wonderful personality.
Posted on: Wed, 13 Aug 2014 18:17:28 +0000
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