It is the night that my child was expected to be due. And one of the first lessons that I have learned is that certain things in this life are not controllable. While I dont think this is the first time I have learned this lesson, I have certainly learned it in new ways as my wife and I have prepared our hearts to welcome this child into our home, our lives, and our daily routines. Another thing I am faced with in this evening is my own daunting imperfection. I had hoped to be so much more before my child came into this world. And in some manners I am probably so much more than I ever hoped possible. I hope in Gods grace that I am able to be present, to be free, to be alive, to love and exist free from the constraints of condemning thoughts and critical ponderings that have formerly shackled me. That I can be present enough in the day to day at 1, 2, 6 and 13 to take moments to laugh, teach, and create memories and traditions with this child as a new member of our little family. I hope that I can keep my eyes off of how I look to fully invest in the work and the life that is right before. My child does not need nor expect my perfection. My God and my Father does not need nor expect my perfection. He fulfilled and satisfied that Himself in the form of His Son. All (Im doing all that I can not to type my son here, because Im 95% sure that this is going to be a boy) my child needs from me is to live honestly, striving to live as Christ lived, in obedience to my Father, seeking to be a man of integrity, vulnerability, and courage. Courage not to do something worthy to be rebroadcast on television or film, but courage to love my wife, my child, to love my God, sacrificially. Giving more than I take, and giving all freely from the abundance I have received. Showing love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control in greater measure every day. Knowing I will need the support of other brothers, men, and fathers along the way, this is my hope. This is my prayer. This is my confidence. He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.
Posted on: Thu, 15 Jan 2015 04:39:23 +0000
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