It occurs to me that most people have no idea that Im an introvert. I played music on a stage for 10+ years and I think a lot of people assume that you need to be outgoing for that to be the case. In reality, on stage is a very safe place for me. I know all the words, I know all the music, I have a script and all I have to do is play the right notes and sing the right words. Easy. Coaching feels very much like performing to me and the assumption is the same - you must be extroverted if youre a good coach. However, the basis for my interactions with athletes is so grounded in my expertise - Ive been teaching exercise for 19 years - it gives me confidence and a logical place to begin. My worst nightmare is going to a party and having to mingle with people one on one. Small talk makes me so anxious, 9 times out of 10 Id rather just stay home. My trusted friends know not to take it personally when I dont show up to baby showers, bachelorette parties, birthday parties, even gym parties. Im not necessarily shy, but Im the type of person that doesnt always like to be the initiator of interactions. If you speak to me first, I will be as warm and friendly as I can be, depending on the circumstances. There also happens to be the issue that the gym for me is my business, my job AND what I do for fun. Im an owner, a coach, a boss, a friend, an athlete ... I have so many hats and its impossible to pick just one. Many times I will stop my personal workout to help someone who needs some attention. Sometimes, when I have a ton of stuff to do and not enough time to do it I just try to put on the blinders and get my nose to the grindstone and pretend no one else is there because if I didnt, Id never get anything done. Sometimes Im able to be successful at this ... but not always. What Im trying to say is, whatever or whoever you think I am -- ITS NOT ABOUT YOU. I am doing the best that I can on any given day. I realize that it might appear to the outsider or onlooker that I have all my shit together but in reality, every moment is a balancing act for me and Im just a person, just like you. I know very well that Im not perfect. And as much as Id like to BE the perfect { boss, athlete, coach, dog-mom, fiance, friend, daughter, acquaintance, business owner, worker bee, whatever } I dont think thats realistic or even possible. I do know that I have a good heart that is truly full of love and Im doing the best I can.
Posted on: Tue, 14 Oct 2014 01:31:27 +0000
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