Its a lovely day in St. Louis. The humidity and heat are at bay, so far. Sunlight dapples the thick canopy of leaves of my sweet gum trees. The squirrels are battling the blue jays in my backyard for first pick of the nut and berry seed I threw out, and Maggie (my dog) just finished up her Second Lunch -- a hearty helping of rabbit poo. Ive managed to ignore the piss and vinegar Ive seen posted throughout Facebook regarding the events in Ferguson, Mo and the death of Robin Williams. I cant ignore it when its sprayed all over my message inbox. Damn, I hate giving lectures (not really), but Id like to tell a few unnamed individuals a few things: 1. I dont need you to tell me the world sucks because youre outraged about something that hasnt impacted you. The world doesnt suck anymore now than it always has. There were only four people on Earth when Cain bashed in his brothers brains. (You all know what Im illustrating here.) People have always been people, and no matter their race, intellect, and location, they have always been varying degrees of kind and cruel to one another. The sooner you step outside your own little world, the sooner youll realize that we all have the same problems when you get right down to it, and those problems could get closer to solved with more understanding and tolerance of each other. 2. Depression is more than sadness, Its more than having a bad day. Its more than just being sensitive, and its definitely not just a phase. Depression is an affliction that can affect anyone. If youve never had suicidal impulses, good for you! But dont insult or deride anyone who has, especially when s/he has the courage to admit such. If nothing else comes from Robin Williamss death, I hope that people who suffer depression find the will to seek help when they feel that ending their lives is the sole solution to their inner torment. In that moment of utter bleakness, please think of those youll leave behind to mourn you. Unless theyre a trigger for your depression, in which case, think of me. Youve made yourself necessary to me...! 3. How black is black enough? I claim the blood of three continents, and Im proud of the ethnicities that blended to make me. If you want to define me by the color of my skin, go right ahead. Dealing with you becomes immeasurably easier when you show me who and what you are. But dont message me with accusations that I dont understand how real blacks feel. I grew up in the same country you did. I experienced the same wounds and triumphs you have. Your path might have been different from mine, but we faced the same roadblocks. The difference between us is that I learned to kick the sh!t out of mine when I was 20 while you stand mired in nearly three centuries of societal muck. We havent always had the simple courtesies, the sublime opportunities, that other people in this country take for granted -- We still dont in many places. But who the hell has? Everyone in America falls victim to stereotypes, exclusions, and prejudice at some point. Is your strife better or more important or more difficult than the next persons? Other than the very few select who have the money to bend wills and situations to their advantage, the rest of us have had to work awfully frickin hard for what we want and what we have! That it hasnt been easy should make it that much more precious! You cant make anyone like you, but you sure can make em respect you for having the temerity and cleverness to accomplish your goals even though they have made your path as difficult as an American Ninja Warrior course. I have never thought I was better than anyone else. For a long, long time, I thought I was a lot worse than the people around me. Im not better than you. Im just more highly motivated. (Heres where Id ordinarily call you a c@cka$$, but Im trying to keep it classy...!) 4. I dont hate my race. I LOVE my race. I think your problem with me is that I dont love my race more than I love any other race. Look at my friends list. Look at my family. You can easily see who was borne to me and who I chose. I CHOSE my brother from the Philippines! I CHOSE my children from the United Kingdom and my granddaughter from Canada! I CHOSE my African-American sister! I draw no distinction between them because family is family, and thanks to social media, I can pick my family from everywhere! Do you have any idea what youre missing, by not reaching beyond your neighborhood or city and yourself to know someone who is completely different from you? The heart is elastic. It has an infinite capacity for love, compassion, empathy and tolerance. If a Grinchs heart can expand, so can yours. (And yeah, I KNOW the Grinch is fictional. That doesnt mean he cant serve as a relevant example.) 5. Im loaded with faults. Always have been. Im asthmatic. I grow magnificently deadly malignant tumors. I have big feet, Im red-green colorblind, Im terribly impatient, I write long, I have at least seven paralyzing phobias, and while I dont like public speaking, I cant seem to stop myself from launching massive missives on Facebook. I almost always mail things later than I say I will, and I am a tremendous busybody who butts into the lives of others. Im loaded with blessings too: I have a way with words. Im generous. Im considerate. I have mad mind palace skills and excellent retention. So when you call me a know-it-all, Im not insulted. I know a lot of things about a lot of things because I read. I listen. I study, every single day. I hate admitting that I dont know it all -- but Im trying to remedy that. Call me a know-it-all. Its better than being a know-nothing or a know-the-wrong-thing... In with anger, out with love. I think its working now...
Posted on: Tue, 12 Aug 2014 20:03:23 +0000
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