Its been a year. A year of sheer terror and a year of blessings and miracles. A year ago from today, my son came into this world. I thought he would be screaming his way out, but instead he barely whimpered. I thought he was just a good baby. Then his oxygen registered at 82%. After only an hour of seeing my sweet boy they rushed him to nicu, where his lungs would collapse during the night. A hospital that I picked because Id heard how great they were, let me know it was out of their hands and we had to go to Jackson. Watching the EMTs putting my baby into a helicopter and taking him away from me was the second most frightening thing Ive ever encountered. The absolute worst, was when Jackson told me he had less than a 10% chance of making it through the night. When I woke up, I discovered he had made it, but it was because of him being hooked to him... He was basically having a total body bypass. They told us he would have to stay sedated and paralyzed and on that machine for about 3 months because he couldnt do it on his own. After a week, when I sang to him, his fingers would tighten around mine. His eyelashes would flutter and his brain activity would go up. When I stopped his blood pressure would rise like he was crying with no noise. Another week and he woke up and was moving his arms while ON the paralytic so they said they had to take him off even though they were scared he wouldnt make it. I think he was racing them to the finish line and wanted to go home with his mommy and sister. Hard to believe its just been a year, baby boy, but its been wonderful watching you grow and heal. Youve been a warrior from day one. I love you so much, Cordell. Happy birthday to my little hero.
Posted on: Wed, 13 Aug 2014 19:28:49 +0000
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