Keep the Fights Private A word of caution and advice to my family and friends on Facebook: If youre in a relationship or youre married, take care not to post about your internal fights. Arguments between your spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend and you are supposed to be between just the two of you. If you really cared about each other you dont want the world to see what kind of jerk the other has been lately. No matter how serious or trivial his of fence is, if you care about him you wont let it haunt him beyond the boundaries of your relationship. Exposing him on fb creates an image of them in the minds of your family and friends that might not necessarily be true. And in this country the relation between your relatives and your spouse is very important. So their opinions matter in some ways. I know you like the attention on fb and the sympathy and the ever-ready advice that your fb friends are likely to dish out. But they(we) dont really know the true context of your outburst. Ive seen very harsh responses by mutual friends. Words like ditch the loser already!, what an a...le! And ever harsher words. All of a sudden everyone condemns your loved one in a way you probably never meant for him/her to be condemned. Every couple fights. Trust me, if my wife or I were to post our fights on fb itll make for very interesting reading. But what will it achieve? One of you will be hurt even more by the outburst than by the pain they initially caused you. Both of you might be embarrassed. And you both most definitely will be the subject of peoples gossip, and sneers. Also an unwanted result. When youre angry with each other, posting about it on fb shouldnt even be on the list of your possible responses. Cool off first. If you require the help of a counsellor, contact them directly. Most of your fb friends dont have the wisdom to dish out sound advice on dealing with such situations. And the sympathy they give out is almost always just a formality on Facebook...theyre not really sympathetic. After they like your status and drop a comment, most of them wont spare another thought for you. Except perhaps when the need some spice to their conversations. Then youll become a mere source of amusement for them. If you just need to vent your anger, to express yourself, Im sure theres always a trustworthy person somewhere that you can release your frustrations to. So please take my advice: keep the fights private. Heavenise day!
Posted on: Tue, 15 Jul 2014 05:30:55 +0000