Ladies~ Marriage: God knows best what each of us want and need. Husbands and wives are made differently. Our internal makeup isn’t the same. Women feel an insatiable desire to be loved. They want to be made of, valued, adored, and protected. But men have a strong yearning to be respected. They want to be their wife’s hero, to be valued as a strong and mighty provider. Both of us want that ‘I’m irreplaceable’ feeling in our marriage: yet in different ways. One problem in marriage that stems from this is that we both go after what we want. Men focus on being respected. Women focus on being loved. When we reach out to our mates we often meet them on our terms with the motive of having our desires met instead of fulfilling theirs. Ephesians 5:33 unveils a great mystery and gives us answers to a good husband wife relationship …. today. Speaking to the husband first, the Holy Spirit instructed Paul to write…“Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” Notice anything here? He gives them each a different command to make the same marriage work. He tells the husband to love his wife. He tells the wife to reverence her husband. Why not tell them both to love and reverence each other? Why the differentiation? Because God created us different with different desires and needs and He knows best what works. We are made differently. Our internal makeup isn’t the same. Men don’t care if you ever give them roses or frilly cards for Valentine’s Day. If you asked a man if he’d rather be ‘made of’ in lovey gooey ways or looked at with respect and admiration, he would choose the respect every time. Don’t get me wrong, men appreciate love too …. but it isn’t their main desire. Women want to be respected too but they prefer to be loved and coddled. We love it when our husband thinks to take us out on a date, or spends quality time alone with us, or when he buys us a new bracelet especially when he randomly chooses it by himself. When we show it off to our girl friends it isn’t the bracelet that makes us half as excited …it’s that he thought of you on his own. God never said, “IF your husband earns your respect then see that you reverence him.” I agree it is hard to respect someone that doesn’t feel worthy of your respect. But if you think about it we are called to do this with others too. We are called to respect their position not their sins or wrong beliefs. We are to honor other leaders too. Do we always agree with them? No. Children are commanded to honor and respect their parents… are we always worthy of respect? Of course not. You might say, “Well, my husband isn’t even saved.” That doesn’t let you off either. God didn’t say, “IF your husband is saved and earns your respect…” He said, “…the wife see that she reverence her husband.” (Notice that He didn’t say, “but only if he is a Christian” or “only if you deem him worthy.”) Take some time to pray earnestly for God’s will in your marriage… even if you are the only one seeking it. Spend time reading God’s Word and find the answers that you need to live a God honoring life in your home with the husband that you have. It honors God when we trust Him in our marriage. “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works” (2Ti 3:16-17).
Posted on: Sun, 27 Jul 2014 12:09:48 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015