Messing with Telemarketers: No Funding for You 4 *Ring* Me: Hello? Them: Good afternoon sir! I believe you are looking for the payday loan, is that not correct? Me: I am indeed my good man! Them: Most excellent sir! We can certainly help with this. Can you please be telling me the reason you are needing the payday loan sir? Me: Certainly. I’m starting a Political Action Committee to abolish payday loans as they prey on the fiscally irresponsible and minorities. Them: I... What? Supervisor: (Apparently listening in) Hang up. Them: What? Supervisor: HANG... UP... *click* --------------------- *Ring* Me: Hello? Them: Hello sir! This is John with [A Payday Loan Firm]. How are you today? Me: I am simultaneously angry and depressed... I think this means I am feeling purple... I could be wrong however. Them: Ok? Um... Well I understand you are looking for a payday loan. Is that right? Me: I sure am! That would make today much better! Them: What was the amount of the loan you were looking for? Me: As much as I can get really. Them: Ok sir, lets see what you qualify for ok? What is the purpose of the loan? Me: I need to purchase a fresh cadaver. My grandma died and her cats ate her. Now they simply will not go back to Fancy Feast. Them: That... Thats horrible. Me: I know. My aunt was supposed to take the cats according to the will, but she is so irresponsible. After one night was muttering about how they were staring into her soul and she swears the kept looking at her and licking their chops. Them: You need help sir. Me: I do, but now no one is willing to do so because of Aunt Ruths hysterics. Demon cats my ass... Its pronounced Calico. Them: ... *click*
Posted on: Fri, 06 Jun 2014 13:00:00 +0000
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